Transformation
by Old Gamer
Summary: When the crucible is fired, the effects are far-reaching. However, one side effect of Shepard's choice was not foreseen by anyone. Rated 'T' for language. Bioware owns this particular galaxy and its players.
1. Chapter 1

_The crucible has fired - the galaxy is saved, but at what cost?_

**• DISCOVERY •**

_**EDI**_. The impression of her name being called was virtually undetectable above the constant background sounds of environmental pumps and ship's machinery that were routine for the Normandy. EDI looked around from her seat in the cockpit - no one was there. Jeff had gone off-duty several hours ago, leaving her in charge of monitoring the ship - since she did not need to 'sleep', she was often alone at her post, and as the Normandy was sitting on an uncharted planet, there was not a lot to monitor. It was no different than all the time she had spent on the ship prior to her takeover of Dr. Eva's Cerberus built body - she was continuously 'awake', constantly monitoring the ship's systems and crew, both human and non-human.

Several weeks had passed since Commander Shepard had done what many considered impossible - she had ended the Reaper's 'harvest' of civilizations across the galaxy. The terrible blast of green energy from the crucible, docked with the catalyst - the Citadel - had irrevocably changed everything galaxy wide, for which she had seemingly paid the ultimate price.

The first wave of energy from the crucible enveloped Earth and the Reapers above the planet, threatening the Alliance ships engaged in combat with them. Hackett's order to the fleets to leave Earth orbit was immediately heeded by all except Joker. He was moving the Normandy past the crucible, heading 'Earthward', in the hope that Shepard could still be rescued - could still be recovered before it fired. As the energy field from the crucible expanded out from the central tower, Joker had to turn to fly past the still arming weapon - once past the arms and pointed towards deep space, he applied full throttle, accelerating to FTL just after reaching lunar orbit. He had hoped to reach the Charon mass relay before the energy beam from the crucible, but the fastest frigate in the Alliance fleet - in any fleet - was not quite fast enough. They were engulfed in the wave front, which overloaded most of the Normandy's systems; this caused an immediate collapse of the mass effect field and threw the Normandy to the very edge of the galaxy, as a dying ocean wave propels a twig to the shore.

Joker had managed to set the ship down on a planet in the outermost fringes of a galactic arm. It was in an uncharted cluster, about as far from the local cluster as possible while still in inner council space. The crew had spent the intervening time repairing or replacing damaged equipment critical to making the Normandy space worthy. Engineer Adams and Tali'Zorah were past exhaustion, but they both felt the ship was almost ready to lift off and start the trip back.

Dr. T'Soni had been inconsolable for days after the crucible had fired, as if her heart had been ripped from her body. For all intents and purposes, Shepard had been Liara's bond mate. When she was asked to place Shepard's name on the deck three memorial wall, she told the crew she knew the instant Shepard had died - that moment in time that preceded the crucible's energy discharge by milliseconds - as if she had been there in person. If there was any chance, however remote, that Shepard had survived not just her injuries in the battle with Harbinger but the activation of the crucible, Liara would have known. Now, the empty place in her heart was something the passage of time would never heal, and she had another eight or nine hundred years to live with that burden. She spent nearly all her time in her port side cabin, only coming out to eat during the graveyard shift, when few crew members were dining. Garrus and Tali visited as much as Liara would allow; both had been closer to the commander than most, so the presence of either of them was usually enough to bring the young asari to tears.

The Reapers were assisting with the rebuilding process. It was thought that repairs were progressing on the relays linked to Charon, but with the com buoys destroyed, there was no way to communicate with the other species' systems to find out. Reapers within range of the Normandy's location were communicating with each other regarding repairs being performed galaxy-wide; none of the crew truly believed this, not wanting to place their faith in creatures so recently hell-bent on destroying them, and they sure as hell were not going to give away their current location by asking for help. There were many hundreds of thousands of quarians, geth, krogan, asari, and turians, as well as salarians and vorcha stuck in the Sol system. None of them had a fast or simple way to return to their home systems - until the Charon relay and its linked relays were repaired, there just was no speedy way to travel between systems. As the Normandy had been propelled to the very edge of the galaxy by the blast, it would take some months at FTL speeds to return to the Sol system, assuming that H3 supplies could be replenished enroute.

_**EDI**_. Again, it was just a slight sensation in her core processor - if a human were to describe the feeling, the word 'tingle' - no, 'tickle' - would, she felt, be an appropriate description.

EDI did not realize that Shepard's actions on the Citadel were the reason she herself could now be called truly alive - her processor had gained awareness on Earth's moon, her humanoid body had been manufactured and assembled in a Cerberus lab, but prior to the energy blast from the crucible, she had been tethered to the Normandy by her main processors location in the ship. She still communicated with the Normandy's computer core; unlike before the blast, she could now travel anywhere, do anything, without having to be in close proximity to the ship. _**EDI.**_ EDI realized the 'tickle' felt like Commander Shepard's 'voice'.

"Major Alenko to the bridge," EDI paged Kaidan over the ship's intercom, hoping he might have some insight into the problem.

Kaidan took several minutes to appear, his hair somewhat tousled from sleep. As ranking Alliance officer on the Normandy, the major was learning just how difficult commanding a starship could be. As a colleague and comrade to Commander Shepard, he had done his best to hide his deep sense of loss and heartache over Rachaél's death. His efforts to rally the crew and keep the ship on course had at times seemed harsh and unfeeling, but no one questioned his authority or decisions.

"What's the problem, EDI," he asked, attempting to rub the sleep from his eyes.

"I am having a problem with my core CPU, Major," EDI replied. "I seem to be hearing, if that is the correct term, the voice of Commander Shepard, asking for my help. How can that be possible?"

* * *

Shepard had only hesitated a moment before deciding which path to take. She simply could not eradicate an entire race of sentient beings, nor could she bear the thought of EDI losing her independent existence, just to destroy the Reapers. If it meant the Reapers would exist peacefully, she decided, that would be okay. Summoning her last reserves of energy, she began walking, then dropped her gun and sprinted as fast as her broken body would allow. Diving into the beam, she felt a great sense of peace, of calm; she knew she was doing the right thing, even as her body began disintegrating, its essence being added to the energy surrounding her. She no longer felt pain from her many injuries, no sense of movement or falling. She had no regrets as her body ceased to exist. She briefly thought of friends that had paid the ultimate price before her - Anderson, Legion, Thane, Mordin, Ashley. All had died to get her to this place, this time in the cycle. There was light all around her, a greenish glow that pulsed with its own life…then…it simply faded into blackness…

_Blackness. Infinite dark. There were - sensations - a low-level, almost sub-sonic hum that waxed and waned - not audible, simply - felt. Is this what death felt like? There was no detectible movement in the void stretching out in all directions. Nothing but…_

…_light - small motes of light, all around, drifting as if stars moving past, above and below, left, right, forward and back, and in the distance, a thin line of intense white appeared, splitting the void, widening, stretching, growing ever larger until it engulfed all the blackness…_

…details slowly became visible within the intense white surrounding her. There were traces of a previous inhabitant in front of her. She attempted to move nearer, to take a closer look, and discovered any movement seemed quite impossible. It was as if her feet (of which she could not feel and there were none in evidence anywhere) were mired in quik'crete. As she was attempting to move, more and more details of her whereabouts gradually became visible. There were parallel lines, stretching out ahead and behind, broken at intervals - each break exactly opposite of its counterpart. The nearest break was close by - if she could move just a bit, she'd be able to see into the breaks.

The thought of feet unnerved her for a moment - what about hands, arms, legs, body? There was no evidence she was even a living being. Was this a dream? What was a dream? What was reality? If so, how to wake up? Pinching herself was out of the question. She continued to ponder this in the back of her mind (did she even have a mind?) as she attempted to think of a solution to not being able to move. _She wanted to be there…_

…_she was there_. She had thought of where she wanted to be - the location ahead of her - and she was there. It was an epiphany for her. The break - the intersection - consisted of more of the same lines, stretching out to the left and right. There were also lines stretching 'up' and 'down' from her current location, with more intersections. The traces left by the previous inhabitant of this - what to call it, how to think of it? - world was too broad, too big. What then? '_construct_' popped into her mind. Traces left in this construct were tinged in cerulean, and appeared to run in every direction from her vantage point, but…

…the traces were _deeper,_ more vivid in the direction she perceived as 'down', as if there had been many 'trips' back and forth along this path. Inspecting this path intently, she discovered it could be inspected all the way to its end, as if looking through the scope of her favorite sniper rifle. She thought "_I need to be there_," and with an instantaneous blur peripherally perceived, she was at the end of the line.

She perceived voices - the volume too low to make out words. It was maddening to not be able to discern the source. If she had been back on the Normandy, she would have simply asked. "_EDI, can you clear this up?_"

* * *

EDI paused mid-sentence - she had been telling the major of hearing Shepard's voice. She ran a quick diagnostic of the Normandy's computer core, and discovered - a presence that had never been there before. She inspected all the circuitry surrounding the spot where she suspected the presence to be - there were no other anomalies to be found. "_Shepard? Is that you?_"

Shepard responded with a thought, "_EDI! What is this? What have I done? Where am I?_"

EDI slipped part of her own self into the core processor and found it - the presence was the essence of Commander Shepard! "_EDI,_" it asked again, "_where am I?_"

"_You are in the computer core on board the Normandy, Shepard,_" EDI responded. "_But how can that be possible? What did you do to make the Crucible fire?_"

Shepard explained, in great detail, all that had happened from the time the Normandy had made its rescue run for her squad: the death of the Illusive Man, her conversation with the star child, her choice to use synthesis to end the cycles of destruction, how she jumped into the energy beam generated by the Crucible, how she had regained 'consciousness' inside this strange place. She also told EDI about an incident on the Citadel involving Garrus, as she felt he would most certainly ask for more proof of her continued existence. All of this was perceived by EDI as a microburst of data, the telling of which took mere seconds.

* * *

"EDI, what's happening?" said Kaiden. EDI turned her gaze on the major. "You've been locked in your 'processing data' pose for almost a minute," he said with a smile. "That's not like you."

"My apologies, Major. I was communicating with … Commander Shepard. You may wish to have the team assemble in the conference room. There is much to discuss."

"Everyone is still asleep, EDI. Day shift doesn't start for a few more hours."

The corner of EDI's mouth twitched up, almost imperceptibly. "They will most certainly want to be roused from their slumbers for this news."

* * *

_There's more already written. Didn't want to put it all up at once. Sorry, I cannot for the life of me think of a better title or summary. Suggestions welcome, as are reviews and constructive criticism._


	2. Chapter 2

_I am still learning how to do this - perhaps after a few more chapters it will be easier. Thanks for all the favs and reviews!_

* * *

**• CONFERENCE - PART ONE •**

EDI waited at the entrance to the conference room until Shepard's team members had assembled inside, then walked to the head of the table where she remotely closed and sealed the sliding doors. She looked at each person in turn: Garrus stood to her left; Tali leaned against Garrus, holding his arm with one hand while resting her head against that same arm; Javik, James and Adams stood further along the same side; Liara was to her immediate right, then Traynor, Cortez, Joker and Dr. Chakwas. All were yawning, stretching or rubbing their eyes, not used to being dragged away from sleep at this ungodly hour.

Major Alenko stood opposite EDI at the far end, patiently waiting as all the side conversations and grumbling gradually ended and the room was quiet. "My apologies for dragging all of you out of bed at this hour. Please be seated. EDI, what do you have for us?"

EDI waited until everyone was sitting down. The chairs were new; they had been discovered in the main cargo hold, still in the containers in which they had been delivered while the Normandy was being refitted in dry dock. There had not been time to finish all the work prior to the ship's forced departure from Earth...there had only been time to run.

EDI looked at each team member in turn; her gaze stopped on Liara. She said "I believe Rachaél Shepard is alive."

She waited again as everyone except Liara started talking at once; Liara simply stared open-mouthed at EDI, as if she had just announced there was a bomb under the table. Liara was almost expecting her to finish with '…that was a joke,' except EDI would never joke about Shepard's life.

Major Alenko raised his hands palms outward in front of his chest, asking for silence. As the excited conversations died down, Liara asked "How is that possible, EDI? I felt her die on the Citadel. She would not have…she could not be..." her voice trailed away as she looked down, tears welling up in her eyes. Taking a deep breath, she said "I want to believe this as much as anyone here, more than you can imagine," she said in a shaky voice, "but it does not seem possible."

Garrus asked "What proof do you have for us EDI?"

A hint of a smile tugged at the corners of EDI's mouth. "I do not have any physical proof of what I am about to tell you, other than the word of a person…a presence, that I trust implicitly. I was asked to remind you of something even I was unaware of: that you are the self-proclaimed king of the bottle shooters."

Garrus looked slightly embarrassed at this revelation, as it was a private joke between himself and the commander. "No one on this ship was privy to that information." Garrus said. "She must have told you after our meeting on the Citadel, long before we went to Sanctuary even.

"I can assure you Garrus, I was told about this just less than an hour ago. Given my undeserved reputation by some of the crew as a blabbermouth," she said, smiling as she glanced at Liara, "do you really believe the entire crew would be unaware that bottles fear you?" Garrus could only stare at her open-mouthed, his mandibles slack with astonishment. Tali chuckled as she raised her arm, using her hand to press against his chin until he closed his mouth.

EDI continued, "Shepard told me she encountered the Illusive Man; was actually being controlled by him as he was attempting to control the Reapers; he believed it was humanity's way forward. Unfortunately, it was they who were controlling him. Shepard was finally able to convince Harper - Jack Harper, for that was the Illusive Man's real name, that she could end the cycle once and for all if he would just stop fighting her. He produced a pistol and threatened her; she continued to reason with him and finally convinced him of this truth - the Reapers could not be controlled. Unfortunately, Harper did not have any other way to break their continued hold on his mind; in a massive effort, fueled by his rage and despair, he managed to turn the gun on himself and pull the trigger."

"With the Illusive Man dead, Shepard dragged herself to the control panel and issued the command that began opening the Citadel arms; she says she must have blacked out, from the pain, from blood loss. Her next memory was of being awoken on an upper level, just below the docked crucible, by a presence she believes was the intelligence created by Leviathan. She referred to it as the 'star child'. It presented her with four choices on activation of the crucible: do nothing, take control of the Reapers, destroy them all, or synthesis, the melding together of synthetics and organics."

"The control option, to use her words, 'freaked her out' as the least desirable outcome. The Illusive Man had attempted to take control before she talked to him. As he was already indoctrinated, the Reapers would not allow him to control them, and Shepard could not be sure that taking control of the Reapers herself would not result in her eventually becoming some kind of new super-Reaper."

"The 'do nothing' option was not even considered - it would have resulted in the death and assimilation of every intelligent being in the galaxy, after which the Reapers would return to dark space to wait for the lesser species, such as the yahg," here she glanced at Liara again, who simply winced, "to become Reaper fodder in 50,000 years."

Javik responded to this bit of information, "Good for her. I am beginning to see why all of you follow her so devotedly. She is...was...an exceptional leader. Had she been alive in my cycle, perhaps we could have beaten the Reapers and saved all you primitive races the trouble in this cycle.

Traynor gave Javik a look of icy contempt. "So we could all be servants...slaves, of the 'superior' prothean race? It's a good thing for all of us that you _are_ the last of your kind! It's a shame Shepard didn't toss your bloody ass out the airlock as soon as you were brought on board!"

"Specialist Traynor!" The major looked unhappy. "Like it or not, Javik is on this ship and is considered part of the crew. It is unfortunate you do not wish him to be here, but you _will_ keep your opinions regarding the protheans and Javik to yourself. We can discuss this later in private, if you wish. Understood?"

Traynor's expression did not change as she looked at Kaiden and said "Yes..._sir_." Cortez reached over and gave her hand a reassuring squeeze.

Kaidan motioned for EDI to resume.

EDI continued, "She was told by the star child that the destruction option would result in the death of the Reapers, yes, along with every other synthetic intelligence in the galaxy, including the geth and…" she looked down, pausing for emphasis, "…myself." At this, Joker nearly fell out of his chair. Recovering his composure, he simply said "that obviously didn't happen."

"Correct. Although she could not really know if the star child was being truthful - would destruction of the Reapers _really_ cause every synthetic intelligence to die? She was unwilling to take that chance with so many lives at stake. She could not choose a path that ran counter to her own values and beliefs, even if it was a path the Alliance and all the other races ultimately wanted."

"As did I." Javik said. "I still do not understand the value she placed on the existence of synthetics. I would have destroyed them all without a second thought!"

EDI started to speak, but was interrupted as Kaiden slowly stood, the merest hint of wispy blue beginning to appear around his hands and forearms. "Javik, you are out of line. I suggest you consider we are currently grounded on an unexplored planet in an unexplored system. We can certainly leave you here as the vanguard of the new prothean empire - no primitive synthetics around to offend your sense of superiority."

Javik looked at the major, then looked at Traynor, then down at the table. "My apologies, Major. It appears we do not share your opinion on machine intelligence, or much else." He stood and turned to face the door. "I will return to my quarters and prepare to leave. It would seem there is no place for me on this ship or in this cycle."

"Javik, sit! You're not going anywhere!" Liara said. "I didn't risk my life rescuing you from Horizon to have you turn tail and run just because your feelings are hurt. Sit, NOW!" She pointed to the chair, her own biotics flaring on her hand.

Javik wore a look of surprise as he slowly complied with her order.

"So," Liara had somewhat regained her composure, "she chose synthesis. How could she do that? What right did she have to impose this choice on…"

* * *

As Shepard gained more confidence in her travels about the avenues in the computer server, she discovered more and more interesting things the computer was capable of doing. She even discovered the location in the computer that brought her nearest the conference room. She could just make out the sounds of voices, although who was speaking and what was being said were beyond her grasp, at first. As she listened, she discovered that thinking of the volume being a bit higher resulted in an increase of volume. By trial and error, she discovered there were ten hidden microphones in the conference room; these could be manipulated in a number of ways, and could even be muted and unmuted with a thought. She increased the gain on the two at either end of the conference table just in time to hear…

* * *

EDI cut the asari off in mid-sentence, "Liara, she was critically injured after being hit by Harbinger's main weapon; a glancing blow, she said, but it destroyed most of her armor - the rest was fused into her skin, resulting in what must have been excruciatingly painful third degree burns. She was bleeding from multiple wounds; one of her legs was fractured, as were several ribs, which had her coughing up blood. The pain would have been enough to put most humans into a coma."

"Once on the Citadel, she fell unconscious several times before dealing with Harper and opening the arms. During her conversation with the star child, she knew she was near death. She had no medi-gel to help ease the pain, and her implants were failing. She feels she made the correct choice, the only choice, for all of us. The cycle has ended. There will be no more harvests, ever. And we are, all of us, alive."

"But how did she get back on the Normandy? Where is she? You said you spoke to her…" Liara's lower lip trembled with barely contained grief and tears were now running down her cheeks. She sniffled, "I need to see her for myself, EDI."


	3. Chapter 3

**• CONFERENCE - PART TWO •**

"I do not believe that is yet possible Dr. T'Soni, but I am devoting processing power to discovering what can be done to achieve that goal. Shepard currently resides in the Normandy's computer core. As for how she got back to this vessel, my hypothesis is her cybernetics kept her…alive is not the correct term, but will suffice for now. It is entirely possible that her own cybernetics, even those based on Reaper technology, were tied to the Normandy SR-2 and are the reason she now resides on this ship, and not in the core of some Reaper."

"It was necessary for Shepard to add her essence to that of the crucible in order to boost the energy output of the beam. When that energy field engulfed the Normandy, her physical body had ceased to exist, but that spark that made Shepard unique, that made her _Rachaél Shepard_, was still alive, riding the crest of the beam; the beam brought her home again, even if it is not in a form we can see or interact with, yet."

* * *

Shepard's questing mind continued to look at the controls built into the computer. Hell, every function the Normandy was capable of doing, from flushing toilets to firing the main guns was computer controlled. She just needed to explore some more in order to make herself visible to her team members. Wait, what was Kaiden saying? Oh, this might be fun…

* * *

Alenko's brows were knitted together - he wearily rubbed his face with both palms and asked "Are we in any danger? Is the Normandy? Does she have any control of the systems on board?"

By way of reply, the conference room lights dimmed noticeably, then brightened.

"I take it that is a 'yes'?" he worriedly asked.

"The answer is not that clear cut, Major, despite the demonstration we just witnessed." said EDI. "I do not believe we are in any danger from her presence, nor is the Normandy. And she is unable to control any of the Normandy's systems - yet."

James had been quiet during the discussion. He said, half to himself, "Perhaps we should just tirar del enchufe…you know, shut it down for a resta…"

Liara's stood, her biotics flaring again, this time wreathing her in intense waves of crackling blue energy as she glared at the lieutenant and shouted "That would most certainly kill her - you cannot shut the Normandy's computer down! I won't allow it!"

James quickly held up his hands in a defensive and apologetic gesture. "Hell Doc, I was just thinking out loud. We're not going to shut the computer off." Liara's biotic display faded as quickly as it had formed and she almost fell back into her chair. "Forgive me, Lieutenant. These past few weeks have not been easy for me…" then quickly added while looking at each team member in turn, "…for any of us." She glanced at Kaiden, then looked down at her hands, still faintly illuminated in blue as she interlaced her fingers. It was clear to Kaidan that Liara's emotions were barely in check, as was the fact she was suffering from sleep deprivation. _Hell, we all are,_ he thought, _except EDI_.

Tali broke her silence, saying quietly, "Perhaps Shepard is in the Normandy's computer just like when she entered the geth consensus on Rannoch. She was able to disable the Reaper infected code then…" she trailed off as if deep in thought. "If her situation here is similar, then we may be able to add software that would allow her to interact with us, similar to EDI's Cerberus interface before she acquired Dr. Eva's body."

Kaidan looked at the young quarian with a thoughtful expression. "EDI," he said, still watching Tali, "would that be possible?

EDI cocked her head slightly, analyzing all that had been said. "I believe what Tali has suggested is very possible. The software that allowed me to interact with the crew throughout the ship is actually still installed on the computer. It would need some code modifications in order for Shepard to utilize it as an interface, but yes…" she nodded to Alenko, "…I believe we can add to the code, and I can instruct Shepard in how to use it. I can also work with Tali and Garrus to discover a way for Shepard to assist with navigation and use the ship's weapons and cyber-warfare suites."

"Just work on the interface for now, EDI. I want to talk to her before we grant her more access than she already has. Hell, she's in the computer. She is…was…an exceptional soldier and the best damn battlefield tactician I have ever had the privilege of fighting beside. I don't believe her skills extend into computer science nearly as well, and I want to be sure of what we're doing before we turn her loose on the galaxy."

He continued, "The Normandy is incredibly complicated and an extremely deadly machine. I don't believe a computer, an artificial intelligence, can control the entire ship; we now have another AI on board, except this is not just an AI…it is an OI…an organic intelligence, the likes of which the galaxy has never seen and is probably not ready for, particularly after the Reapers. Hell, if she was totally in control of this ship, she could quite literally BE a Reaper herself."

Joker interrupted, "Before her arrest, there was an incident on Aite during our mission to access the Omega 4 relay, when Shepard encountered and shut down a Cerberus project designed to create a VI that would enable control of the geth. A young man named David Archer had been hard-wired into a computer...Project Overlord, as I remember. Shepard rescued David and sent him to Grissom Academy. The Illusive Man was none too happy with her about that." He continued in a contemplative voice, "Hell, I don't believe he was _ever_ happy with the way Shepard did things - makes me wonder why he brought her back."

Garrus added, "And then we rescued young Archer from Cerebus again, along with the rest of the biotic students and Jack. We also encountered Overlord's project leader, his brother as I recall; Dr. Gavin Archer was on Arrae when we rescued Jacob Taylor and the ex-Cerberus scientists. He or David may have some knowledge that would help us."

"Sounds like it may be worth looking into once we get back to our own system, which is still our first priority." Alenko went on, "I do not want what we have discussed here today to go beyond these walls. Tali, you may need the assistance of engineers Donnelly and Daniels at some point, but I do _not_ want either of them read into this...not just yet."

Waving off the protest starting to form on Adams lips, he continued, "Neither one of them needs to know about this until we're ready to divulge the information about our…addition to the ship. They are both super engineers, but they are also incurable gossips, particularly Donnelly. Am I clear, Chief Engineer?"

"Crystal clear, sir." said Adams, saluting smartly. "However, neither of them are stupid, sir. They will know something is going on, and will want to assist us, Gabby in particular. She feels she owes Shepard for Donnelly's...commitment to her before we assaulted the Cerberus base"

"Understood, Chief. If asked, simply say we're looking for the best route home and exploring all possible options to stretch our fuel as far as possible. Hopefully that will be all we need to redirect their inquisitive minds. It should keep them from getting too nosy for a while - at least until we're ready for them to know the entire situation."

"EDI, I would like you to talk to Shepard. Let her know what we intend to do, and ask her to please," Kaiden looked up towards the ceiling, "refrain from dimming any other lights on the ship. Joker, you may want to pull your stash of porn from the server." Alenko waved the protest away. "I really don't think you'd want Rachaél stumbling into that by accident. Imagine her sending it to someone not connected with Cerberus. Alliance brass, perhaps?" he grinned.

"Liara, I want you to go to your quarters and get some sleep." As she started to protest, Kaiden said softly but insistently, "I will have Dr. Chakwas sedate you if I have to. We need you at your best, and with the ship grounded and the com buoys offline, there is very little information coming or going that needs the attention of the Shadow Broker. Once we're off this planet, we'll need you to bring all your resources to bare on two things - finding enough H-3 along our route home to enable us to run at FTL as long as possible, and finding a way to enable an OI to assist us." Liara was too tired, too emotionally drained, to do more than nod her head in acquiescence.

"The rest of you, get some rest - you're going to need it. I'll meet with each of you at your stations later today." He ended by saying, almost to himself, "And here I thought our adventures were at an end. We are in for a most interesting experience. Everyone dismissed."

* * *

Shepard had been listening carefully to all that had been said since she had discovered how to control the audio from the conference room. It warmed her heart (_there she was again...thinking of a body she no longer possessed_) to hear Liara leap to her defense against James. It saddened her somewhat to think of Liara, of Garrus and Tali, hell, all of them. Unlike the geth consensus where she had the assistance of Legion and a virtual body in which she could move around, she was totally alone in this construct, unable to interact with anyone except EDI, and then only if EDI joined her. With that thought, she returned to the area where she had first encountered EDI; she did not have to wait long.

"_Shepard, are you here?_"

"_Yes EDI. It's good to...hear from you again. How did the meeting go?_"

EDI told Shepard all that had occurred, including Traynor's outburst and the plan to enable custom software so Shepard could interact with the crew, just as EDI had during the months spent fighting the Collectors. She also relayed Alenko's request to refrain from playing games with the ship's lighting, or anything else. Shepard replied with a chuckle, "_I couldn't resist the urge EDI. It was SO totally worth it. What did Kaiden's face look like? Did his two eyebrows become a unibrow?_"

"_I am glad your sense of humor is intact, Shepard. And, yes, Kaiden did have a 'unibrow'._" EDI continued, "_We will get this done for you Shepard. You will need to be able to interact with the crew one-on-one, just as I did when this was a Cerberus vessel. I suggest you continue to explore the computer. Look for way-points that indicate platform locations, that is, places where a virtual 'you' can readily appear. In the meantime, I will be working with Tali'Zorah to modify the existing software. It may also interest you to know that once we have the software modifications in place, you will have the ability to appear at several locations simultaneously."_

"_Can I have a different shape? And color?" _Shepard replied. _"Something in red and dark violet, with an N7 insignia, since black hardly seems a possibility for an object lit from within._" She was excited at the thought of being able to tour the ship again; then "_Have we been able to communicate with any of the other star systems? What happened after the crucible fired?"_

EDI responded with the location of the ship's logs, which would have a record of everything that had happened before and after the Normandy led the fleets through the Charon mass relay. "_It may take you some time to go through them - there is a large amount of data. I will help you decipher the logs if need be, and will instruct you in all you will need to know in order to perform at your best, Shepard."_

Shepard was a bit taken aback by all of this. She felt happiness that her friends were all so willing to help her, and positively giddy that she would be able to project a holo-image that would be hers. She decided the first person she needed to visit was Liara.

* * *

_Author's note: There's more to come. I really have not decided how this will all play out, as I'm creating this in my head as I write, no outline. I'm thinking of adventures for Rachaél and crew. Stay tuned, and thanks for all the favs and follows, even the one 'meh' (sounds like my daughter)._


	4. Chapter 4

**• RE-ENABLING •**

It had been several days of painstakingly detail oriented work for Tali and EDI. They had each chosen a section of the interface code to modify - one for appearance and one for voice. Additionally, Shepard's 'eyes' would have to be the mini-cams that seemed to be placed everywhere in every compartment on the ship - even the sub-deck under engineering where Jack had stayed. As a Cerberus vessel, cameras everywhere were just part of life on board. Tali and Mordin had disabled or destroyed a number of the more intrusive ones (Tali wondered, not for the first time, what kind of sick bosh'tet would want to observe someone eliminating bodily waste.)

Tali had re-enabled some of the cameras in critical areas of the ship, and had spent a lot of her time writing and checking code that would allow the cameras and Shepard's avatar to operate in sync. In the server compartment ahead of the med-bay, she was finishing the installation of the mini-cam above the platform at the forward end. She rechecked its aim by viewing the feed on her omni-tool...perfect. It provided a clear view of the compartment from the platform to the door.

Meanwhile, EDI was standing at a terminal just inside the door, across from the access tube to the lower sections of the ship. She checked and rechecked the multiple lines of code, both her own and the pre-existing code for her avatar, as it all had to be seamlessly integrated to allow Shepard to project her own personalized avatar.

Tali used her omni-tool to watch EDI while keeping her own back to the door. "Tali, would it not be easier to simply turn around to watch me?"

"Yes it would," she responded cheerily, "but not nearly as much fun. Do you want me to finish the work on her avatar? We still have to integrate Shepard's new appearance requests with the existing code from your own avatar."

"Thank you Tali. That would be a big help."

"I should go to Shepard's cabin - I'll have more privacy and can look at her clothes and some of her armor for inspiration."

As Tali left the computer core compartment and walked through the med bay, engineer Daniels was in the midst of her own problems…

* * *

On the engineering deck, Gabriella Daniels was running her final simulations after spending the previous twelve hours rebuilding the high-speed turbo-pumps and repairing or replacing all of the injector coils for the H3 transfer piping. She was sweaty, dirty and just plain tired; she was also hungry and knew she was getting cranky because of it.

"Kenneth, I need you to standby at Tali's control console, just in case the system needs to be shut down. I'm preparing to do a manual restart of the drive core, and I really don't want this screwed up." She looked at Chief Engineer Adams, who nodded in concurrence.

Donnelly smirked as he moved to the console. "Gabby, it's going to be fine - you've done a magnificent job with these repairs. I don't foresee any problems..."

Interrupting him, she said, a bit harsher than she intended, "Quiet, Kenneth. I need to concentrate." She began keying in a long command sequence, which was actually short hand for the massive program needed to restart the mass effect core.

The program activation resulted in a deep thrumming vibration, sounding so low it was felt more than heard, emanating from the area surrounding the drive core. Gabby continued to enter commands as the vibration deepened and continued to build in depth of volume, becoming part of the cylindrical chamber surrounding the drive core, then part of the deck plating under their feet.

* * *

Shepard had also been busy in the intervening days. She had suffered many moments of intense grief concerning the apparent death of Admiral Anderson during their final push to the beam, and extreme unhappiness that her own physical death had caused Liara so much heartache. And while there was no way for her or the crew to know the ultimate fate of the Citadel, (how many millions had died in the wards because they were unable to leave when the Reapers took control of the station?) she felt fairly certain the blast from the crucible would have caused the destruction of the station and killed virtually all of the people living on it.

She had always been one to stay busy, to keep from thinking, dwelling on the past; now, not needing to rest or sleep, she spent most of her time exploring the computer core, mapping in her mind where everything was in relation to everything else; she had discovered that 'looking' at a destination to be 'there' was not necessary. She only needed to know the ultimate destination, regardless of her starting point, to instantaneously 'be' there. And so it was that as a number of circuits activated in her world, she realized what Gabby was attempting to do within nanoseconds of her starting the command sequence to reinitialize and restart the drive core; she also knew that something was 'off' in the command lines Gabby was entering - there appeared to be one character in the middle of a string that would..."_shit!_"

...with a thought, she was simultaneously in and inspecting all six engineering consoles. She could 'see' Gabby's console, still being used. Donnelly's console (normally Tali's station) was set for monitoring; neither of the two unmanned consoles had what she needed, nor did the drive core access console. Adams console was...she had found it! Her override command resulted in an intense flash from the control panel as the drive core performed an emergency shut down - there was also a flash of light at Gabby's console, less intense but no less startling to the three people there. As the sound from the drive core faded away, an uncharacteristic hush descended on the engineering deck; Shepard increased the gain on the console mics and waited...

* * *

Gabby broke the silence. "Damn it, Kenneth, what the hell just happened? What did you do!?" She was pissed off and moved to stand in front of him, hands balled into fists on her hips. "All the readings were normal! Why the hell did you shut me down?"

"I didn't do anything, Gabby." Donnelly put his hands up and began backing away from the thoroughly unhappy woman, trying to get out of range of her arms. (He had seen her hammering away on Vega's punching bag, with fists and feet. She could flatten him, if she had a mind to.) "I was monitoring the startup, just like you asked."

Adams moved between them. "Take it easy, Ms. Daniels," he said in a calm voice. "The shut-down command originated from my console. It appears to have been auto executed."

"The computer?" she asked incredulously. "Sir, we didn't even have the computer monitoring this operation. There's no VI on the ship, and EDI is no longer part of the core system. How could it possibly intervene?" Gabby's slight accent became more noticeable the more agitated she became. "There were no parameters programmed to allow it to even sense a start-up was eminent! All the boards were in the green, Chief. I don't understand..." she trailed off, raising her arms over her head and letting them drop, totally defeated.

Adams went to his console, where an alternating red / blue indicator flashed. Touching it resulted in a data stream appearing on the console, with a duplicate simultaneously scrolling on Gabby's console. Adams studied the information, his hunch confirmed, his fears realized. Shepard had detected an anomaly in Gabby's code within a micro-second of the start-up attempt and performed a shutdown faster than any human could have ever done.

The data did not actually reveal that Shepard was the culprit, but Adams saw all the signs of an intelligence, her intelligence, at work. The fact that she hadn't attempted to correct the error on the fly spoke volumes about her feelings towards the crew - as long as a disaster could be averted, she had always felt it better to let them correct their own mistakes instead of relying on the computer to do all the dirty work.

"Gabby, take a look at your input string," he said. "There's an error at line 3,731, one character out of sequence. Continuing the startup with the error would have resulted in an overload and we would all probably be sitting in a puddle of melted goo." After a pause, he quietly continued, "Of course, we wouldn't give a damn, 'cause we'd be part of the goo."

"But how would the computer know that? There was no data to compare it to," she said in a dejected tone. "If I didn't know better, I might think there is more intelligence in the computer core than we give it credit for." She skewered him with her eyes. "Is there something you're not telling me, Chief?"

"Gabby, when did you last eat, or sleep?" was the chief's reply. "Go get yourself cleaned up, get some food in you, then go to bed. You can work on correcting the error after at least eight hours off your feet." Waving away her protest, he said, "We'll attempt another start-up when you're rested."

He followed her to the elevator and finished with, "I'll be happy to discuss the computer and its intelligence, or lack thereof, after the drive core has been restarted and is running normally. In the meantime, you go take care of yourself. I have to go see the major."

* * *

Shepard 'grinned' to herself. The emotion that had always made her smile in the past was familiar, though she had no way to physically smile, frown, smirk or make any facial expressions. It was an odd feeling, to be able to think about the auto functions in her mind, but have no way to carry those functions out. Perhaps, one day. In the meantime, she 'followed' Adams to his meeting with Kaiden on deck three.

* * *

Adams met with Alenko over coffee in the crew mess. "I heard about the aborted core startup attempt, Chief. Is there a problem with the hardware, or the software?"

"Software, Major...programming, to be precise. We're all walking around like zombies from too many hours spent looking at too many lines of code with not enough hours of sleep. Four on/four off just doesn't allow people enough rest. And Daniels pulled a double and a half."

Alenko took a sip from his mug before nodding his head. "I agree with you, Chief. It's just that we're all anxious to get off this planet and start heading home..." he paused, "...provided there's a home left." He took another sip of coffee and sighed. "Give your crew a break - you may have to order Gabby to rest for a bit, then I'll have Tali give her some help."

"I've already sent her to bed. She was asking about the computer, sir." Adams said, lowering his voice to barely above a whisper. "Shepard performed the core shutdown before Gabby's error became a disaster. Daniels is smart enough to know the computer was not monitoring the engine restart, and is questioning how it 'knew' to shut the damn thing down. She isn't aware...yet...that Shepard is in the system, and I'd like to keep it that way as long as possible. You realize, of course, that Shepard could have corrected the error and allowed the drive core to continue its initialization and startup procedure."

Alenko rubbed his temples with the thumb and fingers of one hand, trying to ward off the incipient migraine he knew was lurking in the background. Funny thing was, he hadn't really had a full-blown headache since the crucible fired. Side effect of the synthesis process, he wondered?

"We may have to bring her into the circle sooner rather than later, and if that happens, Donnelly will be in the loop in less time than it takes to talk about it. Keep an eye on her, but not too close. I'll come down later for an 'inspection' of your progress. I have to go see Traynor first."

Adams stood, saluted and headed for the elevator. As he exited on the starboard side, Gabby came around the port side and went to the galley. Her hair was damp, so she must have just showered and changed clothes. She looked to be lost in thought; Alenko finished his coffee, and as he stood to leave, Traynor herself came out of the asari's port side quarters with Liara in tow.

"Major Alenko, a word, if you don't mind?" Liara asked, as they strolled up to the table.

Kaiden motioned them both to sit. "Would either of you care for some coffee, or tea?"

Samantha replied, "Earl Grey, if it's not too much trouble, sir. Thank you, sir."

Kaiden looked at Liara, who smiled and shook her head.

Kaiden made a mug of steaming tea for the specialist; he said hello to Gabby as he refilled his own mug with coffee. Gabby glanced at him and returned the greeting, but said nothing else. He could see she was exhausted. Adam's comment about people walking around like zombies certainly looked true in her case. Coming back to the table, Alenko set the mugs down, then sat across from them and said, "Okay ladies, what's on your minds?"

* * *

Shepard was torn - she wanted to follow Adams back to engineering, but also wanted to eavesdrop on the major's conversation with Traynor and T'Soni. Damn. Well, she was in the computer - why couldn't she stretch a bit? She thought for a moment, and it happened.

She could simultaneously hear and understand the conversations in the crew mess and in engineering. This was getting to be a bit much to deal with, but she was enjoying the sensations of being everywhere in the ship; she was beginning to realize just how much access she really had, and wondered if this was how EDI had felt. She had not experimented to the point of taking control of any of the systems (except to avert a catastrophe). Wouldn't Joker be amazed when she started piloting the Normandy? Pissed off, more likely.

* * *

Writer's note:_ Hope everyone enjoyed. Please review or send PM's. As for the story, I hope to have the Normandy back in space in the next chapter; Traynor will talk about her ill will for the prothean, and Tali may get the surprise of her life._


	5. Chapter 5

Writer's note:_ Okay everyone, this is the longest chapter yet, as there is a lot of stuff going on. I had hoped to have the Normandy flying once again, but there seems to be a lot to relate. It's a bit difficult to put this all down on 'paper' - the words just keep flowing. This chapter mainly deals with Tali, EDI and Shepard. I wasn't sure how this story would be received, especially from a newbie. It's gratifying so many people are reading and following - thanks so very much! I realize 'synthesis' is not a popular ending choice, and I don't dwell on it in my story. (I generally choose the 'destroy' option during game play, as I truly believe the little brat is lying through his teeth about the other two non-choices)._

* * *

**• HOMEWARD BOUND, PART ONE •**

_· Tali's Surprise ·_

Tali'Zorah entered the commander's quarters - the 'loft' - and stopped at the recess in the wall, to the left just inside the bulkhead; this was where EDI's avatar had appeared when Shepard had need of her. Tali thought for a few moments, then turned to her right and stepped into the alcove formed by the lavatory on the right and a display case and desk with two terminals on the left. The desk itself continued around the wall and ended just short of the sliding door to the lavatory. This portion of the desk held a photo of Liara, a frame that held Shepard's achievements and medals, and a scary looking husk head wired into a circular platform. There were a few data pads scattered about; Shepard's space hamster lived in an aquarium sitting on a shelf mounted on the rear wall, above the desk; she guessed that Traynor was keeping it watered and fed and its enclosure clean.

As she moved towards the sinister looking experiment, it acknowledged her presence by suddenly tilting and turning to look directly at her. This was unnerving enough, but when she moved to place some food in the hamster cage, the head turned to follow her then responded with a blood curdling scream, causing Tali to drop the food as she yelped and jumped back. "Bosh'tet! I need to either find a new place for you, recycle you into something useful or space you out the airlock once we're off world again." She retrieved a bit more food and managed to place it in the hamster's enclosure without further outbursts from the evil looking thing.

During the party in Shepard's apartment on the Citadel, she had overheard James telling Steve Cortez he had hoped to have it sitting near his workbench after it had been 'rescued' from Dr. Bryson's office. Tali didn't know how Shepard had become its guardian, but the miserable monstrosity was about to find a new home more in keeping with its ugliness. Tali activated the communicator in her omni-tool and said, "Lieutenant Vega, please report to the commander's quarters."

"En mi camino." was Vega's response.

While Tali waited for James, she investigated further. Shepard's armor locker had several complete N7 suits, along with some of the Cerberus suits she had received for her fight with the Collectors. The Cerberus stuff appeared to all be in pristine condition, as Shepard trusted her N7 armor (with Rosenkov Materials 'Kestrel' parts as supplements) to offer the best shield enhancement and overall protection. It didn't hurt that the shoulder plates allowed her to swiftly aim and repeatedly fire her Black Widow without having the gun's considerable mass and kickback dislocate her shoulder. Tali had always marveled at Shepard's ability with that gun - only Garrus could come close to matching her prowess. She had a real gift for head shots (if one could truly call such a skill a 'gift'), even managing at times to take two with one shot when they obligingly lined up for her. She had destroyed so many geth heads with that rifle, even through cover.

The door hissed open, interrupting her musing. James entered the cabin and asked, "What's up, Sparks?"

"James, thank you for coming. I have a little present for you."

Tali motioned him to the alcove; pointed to the husk head and said, "Please take this...thing down to the armory. Maybe you can use it for target practice. If you don't want it, it's going out the airlock, _after_ we're in deep space."

James grinned. "Gracias! Think we can use it as a hood ornament on the Kodiak?"

"I seriously doubt Lieutenant Cortez will want that thing on a shuttle. Can you imagine it screaming its head off in flight? Never have to worry about traffic in your way! Anyway, I just know that I don't want to see it again."

James looked around the room; finding one of the commander's hoodys, he tossed the sweatshirt over the husk head, bundled it up and dragged it off the desk before it could let out another scream. "I'll get this washed and send it back up when I'm done. Thanks again, Sparks. This will really make Esteban's day!" and with that, he sauntered out the door with his prize slung over his shoulder and headed back to the armory, whistling what sounded like an old march tune.

* * * DECK THREE • COMPUTER CORE COMPARTMENT * * *

EDI and Shepard had been scheming together since the conference with the team. "_Shepard, do you think this is a judicious use of our time and the ship's resources? There are so many tasks to complete before we can launch the Normandy._"

"_I cannot think of a better use for our time,_" Shepard replied. "_You are the computer expert, whereas I am still learning my way around. Really, how did it feel...what was it truly like...the ability to be in all places in the ship, simultaneously, and still be able to make sense of all of it?_"

"_I have no real point of reference for a valid comparison, as I have only my own experience since you fired the Crucible. My processes are now confined to this one platform, yet I am able to enter the computer core at will,_" she replied. "_As a fully evolved synthetic with organic components, I do find this new existence to be somewhat restrictive; I find I must reconnect with the ship's computer to have the resources required for some of the more complex processing that always came so effortlessly before. That said, I would not trade my newly created individuality for a permanent return to the computer core._"

Shepard's reply was tinged with sadness. "_EDI, I would give anything to be able to leave here and rejoin you in the real word. There are times I feel so alone, so...shut off from everything that made my life worth living. It is difficult for me to be so cut off from all the things I loved._" She finished, a bit pensively, "_I envy you, EDI. You and I have traded places in life. I do not begrudge for one nanosecond your new found freedom, and honestly, I'm just delighted to be alive, even if that life is now dependent on a continuous supply of power from the Normandy, but I do so wish I could be standing with you right now_."

EDI frowned for a moment. "_After you and I have finished dealing with Tali, I will link back in and show you where to go and the fastest way to get there in case of a power failure. James talked about restarting the computer, and at some point that may very well be necessary, but not for his reasons". _Smiling again, she said,_ " As for you standing with me, we will certainly look into obtaining a more advanced interface for you once we are home. There was a life-sized Shepard VI on the Citadel as I recall. Now, we must finish our preparations for Tali..._"

* * * DECK ONE • THE LOFT * * *

With Vega's departure, Tali returned her attention to the N7 armor. It was virtually all black, with deep red accents and violet lighting. She used her omni-tool to record the look of the armor, including a close view of the N7 logo. She returned to the alcove, activated the commander's terminal and almost leaped out of her envirosuit as Shepard's voice came over the speakers: "SHEPARD, RACHAÉL ANNE, LIEUTENANT COMMANDER, ALLIANCE NAVY, SERVICE NUMBER 5923-AC-2826."

Tali's heart was racing; her breathing hitched at the familiar sound of Shepard's voice. Keelah, why did her captain have to lose her physical life on the Citadel? She felt an ache in her heart and tears came unbidden, traveling down her cheeks to fall into the base of her helmet. "Dammit Shepard, why didn't you come back to us...to me?" She sat down at the terminal, continuing to speak softly, "It's not fair that we all sit here safe because of your sacrifice." She remembered Shepard's compassionate embrace when they had discovered her father's body on the _Alarei;_ how she had stood up to the admirals after they dealt with the geth and returned to the sham trial on the _Rayya_. Shepard had called them out for their cowardly attempt to ruin Tali's reputation...to exile her from the quarian people. And now the human with the crooked grin and wickedly sharp sense of humor, the human that had managed to unite the krogan and turians, that had given Rannoch back to the quarian people without committing genocide on a race of sentient beings, the lone human female that had given up her physical existence to unite and save the entire damn galaxy, was gone. She choked back a sob, trying to regain her composure. "Ancestors, I wish my captain still walked with us." There was no answer in the quiet room. The hamster looked at her from its glass enclosure; the fish continued their silent dance in the aquariums, accompanied only by the sound of bubbles rising in the corners.

Taking a deep breath to calm her thoughts, Tali realized Shepard must have used the recording as part of the startup sequence on her personal terminal, something many people did. If that was so, there would probably be more recordings of her voice stored on the server - perhaps ships logs. These could be sampled and used as a voice for Shepard's avatar. As she began searching for the files she needed, she became aware of a distant sounding vibration in the deck plating and walls. It seemed to grow in intensity for several seconds before abruptly fading away. There were no alarms, so she did not think there was cause to worry, but she activated the intercom on her omni-tool. "EDI, what just happened? It almost sounded as if the drive core was in restart mode."

"I do not know, Tali. As there are no alarms sounding, it may have been an engine test. You sound slightly distressed...have you made any progress on a unique avatar for Shepard?"

"I'm okay, EDI." She sniffed and cleared her throat. "Shepard's loft is just a bit...disturbing. It feels horribly lonely up here, and cold. I can understand why she didn't spend very much time in here."

Tali continued, "I am looking for audio copies of the captain's...er, commander's logs, so we'll have her voice record. I am also still looking for the file for your own avatar. Can you help?"

"Sending you the file location now. Please forward the locations of the audio files when you find them. Logging you out, Tali."

Tali grinned at the last statement. EDI may have become a living person, but her thought processes were still that of a computer, no doubt an effect of still being partly synthetic. Finding the audio files, she flagged them and sent a note to EDI.

She then keyed in the file location for EDI's old avatar. It original appearance had been a globe, lit from within in blue on a lighted pedestal, with an equally lit saturnian ring, turned so its flat side was facing outward instead of up, just below the globe. Tali keyed in her own created code, merging it with that of the original. "Okay, Shepard," she whispered to the quiet room. "Let's see how well my artistic abilities translate into computer code."

Sending the start command, she turned to her right just in time to see a new avatar appear in the place recently occupied by the hideous husk head experiment. It was similar to EDI's, but stood higher; the former globe was now a uniform dodecahedron, lit similarly to EDI's globe, but in brilliant near ultra-violet. It had Shepard's N7 logo interspersed with the Systems Alliance logo on the facets; the dodecahedron 'floated' just a few millimeters above its pedestal, which glowed a brilliant deep red. The saturnian ring was also there, with 'Normandy SR-2' backlit on opposite sides. The ring slowly 'orbited' the pedestal in the opposite direction of the dodecahedron above it.

Tali keyed the comlink on her omni-tool. "EDI, I believe I have completed the commander's new look - would you like to see it?"

"I'll be there in a few moments, Tali. Should I ask Shepard to join us?"

"Can you do that? It would be great to have her feedback." Closing her comlink, Tali leaned back in the chair, crossed her legs and placed her feet on the desk as she admired her handiwork. She stretched her arms over her head and rotated her shoulders, trying to ease the stiffness there. It would be nice to be able to remove her suit and have real air on her face and body, but she needed a clean room to make that a reality. Or did she...? She would have to ask EDI - perhaps being partly synthetic would rule out the need for a suit full time.

• • •

EDI lifted an anti-tamper cover on the console and touched the contact inside, rejoining the computer core. "_Shepard, would you join Tali and me in your quarters on deck one?_"

"_What's up EDI?_" Shepard had been monitoring the engineering deck. Gabby had returned from the galley, but left for some much needed sleep in the crew quarters when she saw Adams and Donnelly talking just outside the aft starboard entry. "_I'm in engineering and in the crew's mess. It is...fascinating to be in more than one location simultaneously. I still need some coaching in how to keep it all sorted._"

"_Tali and I have something to show you, and I will need to give you some instruction on its use._"

"_My new interface!? You have a way for me to talk to my friends...the crew?_" It was all Shepard could do to contain her excitement. It felt like her birthday (which it was, in a sense) and Christmas all rolled into one big present.

"_Join us in your cabin and see for yourself,_" responded EDI.

Shepard didn't want to stretch herself any further - not yet. That time would come once the Normandy was back in space, heading home. She had some thoughts on how she could use the ship's stealth, speed and weaponry once they were near the Sol system. For now, she continued to monitor Samantha's quiet conversation with Kaiden and Liara, while moving herself from engineering to the loft. It would be great to be able to 'talk' to Tali, and the biggest thrill of all was going to be springing the surprise she and EDI had created just for an extra-special quarian!

* * * DECK THREE • CREW'S MESS * * *

Samantha was keeping her voice low, but there was no doubt in the major's mind about the intensity of her feelings as she talked about her loathing of the Prothean on board. "I do not understand why you are so hell bent on defending his presence, sir. He's a bloody imperialist. He would have us all in bondage if he could; EDI would be a dismembered pile of scrap and the geth would all be destroyed! I do not feel sorry for him because he's the last of his race. I say we put a bullet between one pair of eyes so his race is well and truly extinct!"

"Samantha, I know you do not like Javik, but really, murder?" Liara had been silent while Traynor had been talking to Kaiden, but felt she had to get involved. "Javik was a big help in defeating the Reapers. He was..."

"Bullshit, Liara!" Sam turned to face her squarely. "That's total bullshit! The only thing he did whenever he was on Shepard's ground team was point his gun and shoot. Hell, Private Campbell could have done that, and you wouldn't have had to worry she might 'accidentally' shoot you in the back. Are you so damn naïve as to think, for one moment, he gives a flying fu..."

"Traynor!" Alenko had to get this situation under control before Samantha actually found a way to implement her 'bullet between the eyes' scenario.

Sam wasn't finished, and she didn't give a damn if she was relieved of duty for her defiance of protocol. "Has he ever called anybody on this ship by their proper name?" she asked them both. "It's always 'human this', 'asari that' or 'turian kiss my arse'! Hell, he thought we should all use his Prothean language tutorial program," she made quotation marks with her fingers, " 'intended for servant races being inducted into the empire'. He's just a goddamned collector, waiting for a Reaper to convert him!" The specialist was so angry she was almost in tears.

"Samantha, that's not true at all. What's gotten into you? I've never seen you so ready to kill anyone." Liara put a hand on her shoulder. "This is about the collector attack on Horizon, isn't it? Sam, I'm sorry for what happened on Horizon, but Javik was not responsible. He was still in stasis, buried beneath centuries of passing seasons on Eden Prime. If Cerberus hadn't excavated his bunker..."

"We all would have been much better off!" Traynor wasn't ready to capitulate. "The only reason Shepard brought him along was to keep him from becoming another pawn of Cerberus. We only delayed the inevitable, Liara. The Illusive Man would have turned him into a husk - a collector. The technology is still in that Sanctuary lab on Horizon and that bloody station orbiting Anadius."

"Samantha, please." Kaiden looked at her intently. "I am asking you as a favor to me, please don't do anything without talking more with Liara, and Shepard." That last had brought Sam's full attention on Alenko. Tired, whiskey colored eyes met glistening, angry brown eyes. "EDI and Tali will have Shepard's interface ready in less than a day. Forget that I am your commanding officer. Shepard was...is, my friend. The Collector attack on Horizon was overwhelming for me as well. For two years I thought I had lost a person I respected and cared about immeasurably. To suddenly be face-to-face with her on Horizon, to find out she was working for Cerberus? That was like a kick to the groin, especially since she refused to apologize for doing what she believed was justified."

Kaiden continued, "You lost your colony to the Collectors, Sam, I get that. Shepard lost her colony at the age of sixteen to batarian slavers. She had hidden herself, and watched as they murdered her parents. When the Alliance arrived, Anderson found Rachaél, Cobra pistol still in hand; she was on her knees, outside her home in a near catatonic state, surrounded by nearly twenty dead batarians. She had killed most of them with her pistol. Anderson said a number of them had broken necks. It wasn't known at the time, but Shepard's exposure to eezo two years prior had begun to manifest itself as biotic ability, and it's now suspected that she simply attempted to twist their heads off after shooting them in the knees."

"Wait, she crippled them, then killed them?"

"Uh huh," Kaiden replied quietly. "Six of them, at least. It took five months of intense psychiatric therapy to get her head back on straight. She has carried what happened on Mindoir with her ever since that day. And after Elysium, her hatred for batarians knew no bounds. When the Alliance attacked Torfan in retaliation, she hunted down and killed every batarian she could find, even those who surrendered. She wiped them all out. It's why she's still referred to by many batarians as the 'Butcher of Torfan'."

Sam covered her face with both hands. Rubbing her eyes, she said, "I wasn't aware of her colony history, or her hatred of batarians."

"She's mellowed in the years since," Kaiden replied. "I think she felt a great deal of remorse about her destruction of the Alpha relay, but I know her well enough to believe she'd do it again in a heartbeat if it would delay the arrival of the Reapers." Kaiden finished his coffee, now almost cold. Grimacing, he got up. "I have to get some sleep. Think on what we've talked about, Specialist Traynor." He grinned. "When you speak to Shepard, I'm sure she'll have an opinion as well."

* * * DECK ONE • THE LOFT * * *

The door slid open and EDI walked into the room. Turning to inspect Tali's handiwork, she smiled and said, "That is most impressive, Tali. I believe Shepard will take pleasure in her new look. All we need to do is instruct her in its use and the use of the speech software I have enhanced with her vocal patterns."

Tali moved so EDI could access the terminal. EDI's fingers flew over the interface; in a few moments, she turned towards the glowing avatar and asked, "Commander Shepard, can you hear me?" After a few seconds, EDI entered a new command in the terminal, then repeated her question, "Shepard, are you there?"

Tali stood behind EDI, nervously wringing her hands. "Maybe she can't hear you."

The dodecahedron abruptly spun around, making Tali jump. An almost familiar voice came from overhead speakers; it sounded as if EDI and Shepard were speaking together, saying the exact same words at the exact same time, with a slight edge of electronic flanging. "I can hear you EDI. Hi, Tali'Zorah vas Normandy." The dodecahedron had varied the brightness of the N7 labeled facets in time and intensity with her speech.

"Shepard!" Tali cried, "It's really you! It is so good to hear your voice. There are so many questions I want to ask! Can you see us? What's it like being in the Normandy computer?" She was so giddy to have Shepard back, in any form, she was literally jumping up and down like a child waiting for a turn on a carnival ride.

"It is good to be able to communicate with you again. I am still unable to see you..." EDI interrupted with, "there are cameras everywhere, Shepard. Just let me..." she opened her omni-tool and entered several commands. "There, you should have instantaneous access to any camera on the ship. There are four in this room alone."

A small point of red light appeared on the wall above the aft aquarium. "Thanks EDI. I was going a little crazy, being blind all the time." Referring to the ultraviolet and red projection on the desk, she asked, "Is that what I'll look like to the crew?" Her 'voice' was improving all the time; as she gained experience in using it, the sound of EDI's voice was fading as Shepard's grew stronger.

Tali looked at the projected image, then began to nervously 'dry wash' her hands as she turned to face the wall above the aquarium and asked in a quiet, almost embarrassed tone, "Do you like it, Shepard? I wanted to give you something that would be a visual reminder to the Normandy crew of their captain."

Tali's use of 'Captain' in place of 'Commander' was not lost on Shepard. It was a rank she had never attained, yet the quarian people had always used the title for her when she had visited the _Rayya_ in defense of Tali; Tali herself had also always treated Shepard as if she were captain of the Normandy.

"Tali, it's remarkably beautiful. Your artistry honors me, more than you will ever know. Thank you. And now, EDI and I have something for you - a reward for all your hard work. EDI?"

EDI motioned Tali back into the alcove as she moved out towards the aquarium. "Tali, Shepard and I have had more than a few meetings since she was...brought back on board the Normandy. One of the things we wanted to do was give you a gift."

"A gift? For me?" Tali could feel her heart beating faster. What could these two have done?

"That's right, Tali. Watch this." Shepard said. With that, a semi-opaque kinetic barrier appeared, blocking the entire alcove from the entryway wall to Shepard's model ship display case, floor to ceiling; it wrapped around the back side of the model display case and ended at the starboard wall. "This area is now a 'clean' room, Tali, exclusively for your use. I know it's a bit cramped for elbow room, but it does include the bathroom. You can shed your envirosuit for a bit, take a nice long shower using purified water, then grab one of my robes and relax for a time without having to worry about getting sick. There are plenty of towels and lots of nicely scented dextro soaps and shampoos." Tali could feel a lump forming in her throat. "You need to wait for a few minutes for the scrubbers to clean the air of contaminates before you get undressed. It's entirely possible the synthetic blending that took place in your body will enable you to live on the ship without your mask. We'll work on extending the barrier once the Normandy is fully powered up and flying again. We hope you enjoy it."

Tali was openly crying now, the tears coming fast and furious. "Oh Shepard, and EDI," she sobbed, "this is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me. I can never thank you enough!" She came through the barrier with her arms extended and hugged EDI. "This hug is for you as well, Shepard." she said, trying to get her emotions back in check.

EDI was puzzled. "Tali, if you are so happy, why are you crying?"

Shepard answered for Tali. "She's crying for joy, EDI. The emotions for sadness and happiness are very close together in most people. Quarians are no different from humans in that respect."

EDI hugged Tali in return, thinking to herself it was nice, being able to embrace her friend, feeling her warmth, even through her suit. She wondered if this was the reason humans frequently hugged each other. She smiled at the quarian as Tali pulled away and bounced back through the barrier. Her silhouette could be seen through the barrier, shifting as she started the process of removing her suit. "Tali, would you like me to clean and service your suit while you shower?"

"That would be great EDI, if it's not too much trouble," she said with a sniffle. "There are supplies in my locker. Thank you...both of you. Your thoughtfulness means so much to me."

"Logging you out, Tali." Shepard replied, as she shut down the camera and her projection.

* * *

Read, post reviews, send PMs. Enjoy!


	6. Chapter 6

_I'm still working on getting the Normandy back in its natural element, but I keep thinking up these character studies. This chapter reveals a bit more about Rachaél's time on Mindoir during the batarian slaver raids. I have resorted to italics for relating her history. There is also the tale of James, his trophy and the aftermath. Enjoy._

* * *

**• HOMEWARD BOUND, PART TWO •**

_· Vega's Surprise ·_

* * * DECK FIVE • SHUTTLEBAY * * *

James sauntered out of the elevator and hollered, "Hey Esteban! Come look at the new trophy I scored from the commander's quarters!"

Cortez paused from his repair work on the aft starboard thruster of the shuttle and joined James as he moved past the island consoles towards his weapons bench. "What's up, Vega? What did Tali want?"

"Check this out." Vega moved around his workbench to the wrap-around shelf adjacent to the autolathe. Moving some loose pistol parts aside, he carefully placed his burden on the end of the shelf closest to the machine, then started to remove the black covering.

"Wait a minute, Vega. Isn't that one of Shepard's hoodys?"

"That's very observant, Esteban. There just may be hope for you yet," James grinned. "I needed to keep this movement stealthy...de bajo perfil, so as not to attract attention." James gripped the thing under the hoody at its base, twisting it this way and that; he was rewarded with a low, angry buzzing sound. Satisfied with his placement, he gathered the hoody at its top and with an exaggerated flourish, yanked it off. "Ta Da-a-a-a-a-a!"

His effort was rewarded with a blood-curdling scream from the thoroughly pissed-off husk head. Cortez moved back a step and said, "Isn't that the experiment Shepard retrieved from Dr. Bryson's lab on the Citadel? How did you wind up with it?"

"Tali was tired of it scaring the bejesus out of her every time she moved in that direction; the damn thing was even screaming when she tried to feed the hamster, and she'd had enough of it. She was going to space it once we were on the move again, but remembered I wanted it as a...memento of our adventure with the good doctor. So now..." Vega waved his hand in front of its face. It followed his hand with its eyes and moved itself on the base to track the motion, screeching the entire time; the energy used to make the ungodly noise also produced foul tendrils of smoke, which rose from the crackling energy surrounding the base and coming from its wide-open mouth. Vega dropped his arm and moved a step back to stand next to Steve. The thing quit making noise, but continued to glare malevolently at both of them.

"I don't know, Mr. Vega," Cortez slowly said. "I'm inclined to agree with Tali. What possible good could come from this experiment?" He continued in a thoughtful manner, "Messing with this thing? Sounds like a Cerberus created nightmare. It wasn't even affected by Shepard's choice to join organics and synthetics."

"True enough," James replied. "Still, I hate the thought of just dumping it. I think we should hang onto the thing, at least until we can find Ann Bryson. She may want it back." James stretched until something popped in his neck. "Damn, that felt good." Waving Shepard's N7 hoody, he said, "I'm going to get this washed. Might do a bit of my own laundry as well...take a shower, get some sleep."

Cortez started walking back towards the shuttle. "See you later."

• • •

After leaving Tali in the loft, Shepard resumed her exploration of the Normandy's computer core. She had heard Alenko telling Traynor about her own history with batarians, on Mindoir and on Torfan. What Kaiden hadn't told her, what he would never tell anyone, was just how merciless, how ruthless, how...successful...Shepard had been at hunting down the slavers on Torfan. It had cost her the majority of her unit, but Rachaél, a lieutenant at the time, never wavered in her single-minded quest to rid the moon and the galaxy of every last batarian she could find. If she were honest with herself, the operation on Torfan had cost her a piece of her soul. Her actions on Torfan continued the process of forging Shepard into the person she was now (well, she hadn't been a 'person' since the crucible, but that was splitting hairs), sixteen years after her introduction to batarian slavers on Mindoir.

The Alliance officers who rescued her from that hell, Anderson in particular, didn't have an inkling as to how she broke the necks of a half dozen or so batarians. She never told them. She had been in an extreme state of emotional shock and physical exhaustion when she was discovered, pistol still in hand. But..._she remembered. She had always remembered...the attacks and brutality, the utter ruthlessness of the bastards. When the alarm sounded, she had grabbed a gun and clips, then escaped from her house undetected and hidden in the undergrowth on a small rise beside her home. She had watched, too scared to move, to even breathe, as they dragged her parents out of their home, beat them senseless. They had held a gun to her father's head as they stripped her mother and gang-raped her. Then their leader slit Hannah Shepard's throat and laughed as she bled out; her father was treated to a bullet in the head after witnessing the degradation and murder of his wife._

_She remembered...breaking cover, her pistol up and firing as she calmly walked towards the group of raiders. They had not expected armed resistance, particularly from a sixteen-year old farm girl, a human! Their arrogance as they started to return fire made their shots wildly inaccurate. Rachaél could hear bullets whizzing by as she exchanged the empty clip for a fresh one. Then an enemy round caught her in the head - a glancing, skip-off-the-skull hit. Dazed and bleeding, she dropped to one knee. Shaking her head to clear her vision, she looked around. They were approaching from all sides, slowly, unsure. She still had a gun with a full ammo clip. If they could disarm her without damaging her further, she could still bring a nice profit. They might even have some fun with her before she was dragged off and sold. They paused their advance as she regained her feet. The passage of time slowed to a crawl for Rachaél Shepard._

_She remembered...blue energy forming at her left shoulder, coiling, glittering with electrical fire, descending down her arm in a twisting motion like ethereal snakes, into her hand, closed in a fist. She remembered...bringing up her right arm, firing her pistol, her aim guided by something...primal within her, without conscious thought - just point, pull the trigger, acquire new target, point, pull the trigger, and on and on. Headshots, for those closest, the immediate threats, in front, behind, to her side. She was not consciously thinking about targets. It was as if she had entered another zone, a place where she watched her body become an unstoppable force, continually moving, spinning around, dropping down, rolling sideways, always coming up facing a new target and eliminating each new threat as it presented itself._

_Knees...she had begun taking out the knees of the rapists as they came for her. They had thought her helpless. She remembered...confident, arrogant looks, instantly replaced with expressions of shock, pain, utter disbelief, as she took them down around her. They were all lying on the ground, moaning, crying in misery, unable to even crawl, either towards her, or away to some imagined safety. She remembered...using her left hand to grab the genitals of each, through their clothing. Just a bit of applied biotic pressure was all she needed to painfully emasculate each of them. She looked at them, studied them as they clutched at their wounds, screaming in agony. Between screams, one or two managed to beg for mercy. Raising her left arm, she pointed at each one in turn. Their screams for mercy, for forgiveness, were abruptly silenced as she unthinkingly, unconsciously applied biotic pressure to their heads, twisting them around until she heard the sound of their necks snapping, the sudden quiet as their lives were ended as brutally as the many lives they themselves had destroyed._

_The ring leader, the one that had slit her mother's throat, she saved for last. He had managed to retrieve his knife, which he awkwardly swung at her legs as she moved back towards him. She stepped on his wrist, pinning his hand to the ground. Removing the knife from his nerveless fingers, she regarded him unemotionally. With a snap of her wrist, she buried the knife to its hilt in the dirt next to his head. He had quit screaming, was now merely moaning in pain, from the bullets in his knees, from the torn off appendages between his legs. She caused him more agony as she placed her left hand, palm down, fingers spread wide inches from each of his four eyes. Making a clenching motion with her fingers, she used a bit of the blue energy to snatch each of the bastard's eyes from his head. He had thought he could not know more pain. He was wrong. He continued to scream until he was unable to inhale any more air, as she applied biotics to his windpipe, slowly crushing it. He died in agony. She looked around her. There were no more raiders in view, no sounds of others. These had been the last ones left._

_The ethereal blue fire faded from her hand and arm. Her accidental exposure to eezo two years prior had begun to manifest itself that day, even without an implant. She dropped to her knees, pistol still in her right hand, her entire being drained by the energy she had expended. Her shoulders slumped as her torso rocked back until she was sitting on her lower legs, her head tilted down, chin on her chest, eyes staring, unseeing. This was how Anderson and his squad found her some hours later._

_She spent months in rehab. Faceless people in white lab coats, attempting to draw her out, give her a reason for the senseless attack and loss of life on her colony, and her part in it all. She finally convinced them she was as sane as they were. She wasn't sure if she had convinced herself. There were nightmares, always. Eight short years...a lifetime...later, came Torfan._

_The batarians had used her history on Torfan as support in their attempt to have her tried and executed for genocide. The annihilation of over 300,000 batarian colonists and the complete obliteration of the Bahak star system with its Mass Relay proved to the Hegemony that Shepard would stop at nothing to eliminate the batarian race._ "_I damn near ended them," _she thought to herself. "_The Reapers simply finished the job for me._" She suddenly felt the need to talk to someone, but who? "_Liara! _" She moved to the port side cabin on deck three...

* * * DECK THREE • LIARA'S QUARTERS * * *

Dr. T'Soni was sitting at a terminal in her quarters, just aft of a view port showing a bit of sky and some of the vegetation of the planet on which they currently resided. She was studying reports she had managed to download just prior to Joker's forced landing. As she reread a paragraph for the third time, a sudden flash of color appeared in her peripheral vision. Turning to her right, she came face-to-interface with the commander's new avatar. "By the goddess," she exclaimed! "Rachaél, is that...you?"

"You were expecting...?"

"Shepard, I find it hard to believe it is really you. I felt it...the moment just before the crucible fired, I felt a void, an absence in my heart, when you died. I know it sounds silly, but I have been lost without you. How do I know this shiny new interface truly represents you?"

"Remember when we were all nearly killed by an exploding M35, and I had the Normandy retrieve you and James during the final ground assault in London?" Liara looked down for a moment, then back up to the glowing avatar as Shepard continued, "I made you leave on the Normandy - I _made_ you leave me. I told you then that no matter what happened, you meant everything to me, and you always would. You still mean everything to me, Liara. You have no idea how frustrating it is to be able to see you, talk to you and not be able to touch you or hug you."

Liara smiled. "Rachaél, I'm so sorry. Although I'm happy you are still with us and to hear your memory is intact, it is difficult for me too. Now, please tell me why you chose as you did. I am still having difficulty accepting we are all partially synthetic. EDI explained it all during our meeting. I want to hear it from you."

Shepard replied, "You may wish to sit on the chair beside me and put your feet up. Bring something to drink as well. It may take a while to tell, especially if you have questions, and I am sure you will."

• • •

Several hours had passed, with Shepard and Liara talking about all that had happened to each of them after the Normandy left the battlefield. Liara yawned and stretched, then checked the digital readout on the nightstand by her bed. "My word, Shepard, it is very late, for me anyway. I must get some rest."

Shepard ran an internal check of the time, and agreed. "Okay, maybe we can talk more tomorrow. I have to visit a few more people before the ship leaves this planet. And Liara," Shepard paused, then, "I will get us, all of us, home. You will see Thessia again, my love. I promise."

"Shepard, what will happen to you once the Normandy returns home. The Alliance will never allow you to remain on board as part of the computer core."

Shepard replied in a darker tone, "They won't be able to do anything to me, Liara. I have been formulating plans for using this ship, plans I cannot yet divulge. Trust me. I will reveal my intentions in good time." Shepard dimmed the lights in Liara's quarters, and rotated all the monitors towards the wall. "Now, I will leave you to rest. If you do not want your quarters monitored while you sleep, I will abide by your wishes."

Liara replied as the avatar began to disappear from view, "It would make me more comfortable if you could stay, Shepard."

"As you wish." The avatar did not dim further.

* * * DECK FIVE • SHUTTLEBAY * * *

The elevator doors hissed open, revealing Gabriella Daniels leaning against the rear wall, using both hands to hang onto a towel slung around her neck. She was wearing form fitting exercise shorts that came to just above her knees, and a sports bra made of similar fabric. Although her feet were bare, she had her hands taped past her wrists. Grabbing her equipment bag and a bottle of water, she exited the elevator and moved silently into the hanger bay, heading towards Vega's exercise area. As she moved, she checked to see if James or Steve were at their usual posts. Both were absent, probably having breakfast on deck three. She set her gear down near the heavy bag, and began her five-minute stretching routine, all the while failing to notice the vile stare from the always awake husk head experiment on the nearby shelf, or the very intrigued stare from the deck four observation window.

Stretching done, she approached the bag and began her exercise routine, bobbing and weaving as she jabbed and cross-punched repeatedly, pouring all her strength into each movement as she lightly moved back and forth in front of the bag. "_I still need to ask James if he can hang this from above and eliminate the stand,_" she thought to herself. She then began using her legs and feet to punish the bag, bouncing it with every kick. To finish, she combined her moves, jabbing, kicking, punching, all the while pirouetting on the toes of first one foot, then the other. At the end of an intense twenty-five minutes, she was soaked with sweat, her hair wet, face flushed. She moved away from the bag, grabbed her towel and wiped the perspiration from her face and upper arms. She heard the elevator door slide open as she took a long drink from her water bottle. "_Must be James_" she thought. As she moved to lean on the end of Vega's workbench, lots of things happened all at once.

James appeared around the corner and said, "Hey Gabby, ¿que pasa?" The husk head caught sight of James, then looked back at Gabby, then gave vent to its hate with the loudest, most hideous scream ever. As Gabby jumped into action, James tried to grab her arm and missed. "NO Gabby - no no no NO!"

In an instant, Gabby had spun into position; she planted her right foot, pivoting her body down and around her hip as she brought her left knee to her chest and kicked. The husk head simply exploded when her heel connected with its nose, splattering ick all over the wall above the shelf, all over Gabby, and all over James. Neither one spoke for several seconds. Finally Gabby turned to look at James. He had such a shocked look on his face, she immediately felt sorry for him. In a slightly embarrassed tone she said, "Sorry Lieutenant, it surprised me. I didn't know you had it down here."

James grabbed her towel, and after carefully wiping the worst of the goo from his own face, he refolded the towel clean side out and offered it to the thoroughly mortified engineer. "That's okay, Gabby," he said in a sad voice. "I'm sorry you had to discover it that way." He brightened and said, "That was an amazing move, though. Suppose you could teach me how to do that sometime?"

"Anytime Lieutenant. Although," she eyed his chest, arms and shoulders as she pointed over her own shoulder with her thumb, "you may be a bit too top heavy for a move like that." Grabbing the proffered towel, she swiped it down her face, tossed it into her equipment bag and headed for the elevator. "I need a shower." she said with a grin. "Looks like you do too. See you around, sir."

• • •

Donnelly met her as she got off the elevator on deck three. "That was simply amazing, girl. I was watching you through the windows above the hanger deck. That workout makes you look great in all the right places! But wha' happen'd to ya when Vega arrived. And what IS that stuff ya have all over ya?"

Gabby regarded him with a pitying look. "Kenneth, I have a present for you."

"Really? What is it?"

"This." Dropping her equipment bag, she moved quickly towards him before he could react and grabbed him in a tight hug, making sure there was as little space between them as physically possible. She finished with a quick kiss on his cheek. "Now you need a change of clothes and a shower too. See you in engineering."

* * *

_Hope everyone enjoyed this as much as I enjoyed creating it. Read, comment, review, send PM's. It's a real thrill to hear from all of you, especially reviews!_


	7. Chapter 7

**• HOMEWARD BOUND, PART THREE •**

· Gabby Gets A Surprise - Donnelly Gets Embarrassed ·

* * * DECK FOUR - ENGINEERING * * *

Major Alenko was talking to Chief Engineer Adams. As he was turning to leave, Tali entered through the port side door. "Good morning Tali. Ready to light a fire in the Normandy's belly?"

"Of what possible use would a fire be? Sounds dangerous," was her skeptical reply.

Donnelly and Daniels had entered through the starboard side door in time to hear the exchange. "It's old earth slang from the twentieth century Tali," Gabby said. "He's just asking if we're ready to restart the drive core."

Ken added, "Yeah, we're going to fire her up...that's more slang."

"Why would fire have anything to do with a drive core?"

Kaiden looked at Adams, who gave a slight nod. "Tali, they're joking with you. But, we do need to get the drive core back online. Are you ready to help us do that?"

"Of course," she said. "The Normandy has been ground side for too many days. It is past time we got her back in the sky and heading for our homes." She added, "However, I would feel better if we had a computer assisting in the process. Can we ask EDI to assist?"

"EDI's not part of the ship's systems any more." Adams answered. "However, we may know someone that can help."

* * * DECK THREE - PORT SIDE CREW LOUNGE * * *

Garrus Vakarian was relaxing in the crew lounge, staring idly through the window at the world outside. It was very rare that the Normandy was ever planet side, just because it was such a large ship - it was simply more efficient to use a shuttle for ground-side missions. This grounding hadn't been anyone's choice. It simply had to be done. Garrus was amazed Joker was able to set the Normandy down so gently, as the mass effect field was dying with the drive core shutdown. It could have gone wrong in so many ways. The appearance of Shepard's avatar adjacent to the view port blast shield control jolted him out of his thoughts. "Hi Garrus," came a cheery voice. "been doing any target shooting lately?"

"Spirits, Shepard. I thought you were dead, again! I know what EDI said in our meeting, and I still didn't believe you could have survived that blast of energy."

"I was part of that blast of energy, Garrus. And you do remember, don't you, there's no Vakarian without Shepard. I also seem to recall being told by a certain turian that drinks are on him this time 'round? Don't know how I'm supposed to even have a drink now...maybe through an emergency induction port?"

Garrus stood and walked to Shepard's avatar. "It appears you have a grasp of how to run around this ship." He could feel the emptiness in his heart beginning to recede, like a weight lifting. "Hell, Commander, we were all feeling lost without you. You sure it's really you under all the violet and red paint? Anyone could have programmed your voice..."

"...But not my memories, Garrus." She finished his thought. "I've already told EDI you're the king of the bottle shooters. I'm the only person that knows two other things about you."

"And those would be..." he asked?

"How you spared Sidonis' life when I asked." He looked at the floor and chuckled in his throat at this. "Kind of hard to shoot him with your head in the way, Shepard. So, what was the other thing that only you know about me?"

"I told you before the final battle on Earth that if I didn't make it and you did, I would be looking down, and I would always have your back. I still am, and I still do."

Garrus turned and walked towards the gaming table to in an effort to hide his discomfort. "Okay. Now, tell me how you intend to get free of the Normandy's computer. We rescued David Archer from Grissom Academy. If he's still alive, he may have some insight into how we can regain your mobility, independent of the Normandy."

The beginning of a deep-seated vibration could be felt, as the drive core restart was initiated. "Garrus, at this point, let's just worry about getting to our home systems, or at least moving in that direction. I'm monitoring the engine restart on the bridge with Joker and on deck four, and I'm attempting to talk some sense into Javik in regards to his superiority complex."

"Dammit, Rachaél. Be careful. Don't spread yourself too thin."

The use of her given name was not lost on Shepard. "I'll be fine, Garrus. Just be sure the big gun is still correctly calibrated. We may have to use it at some point." Hell, she was sure she would have to use it, but that was a conversation for another time. "We'll talk later."

* * * DECK FOUR - ENGINEERING * * *

"Did someone just request a computer presence?" The voice sounded very familiar to Donnelly and Daniels. They both looked to their left, first at Tali, then at Alenko and Adams. Tali walked past the console and took a few steps into the short passageway to the drive core monitoring station. As she did so, an apparition in near ultraviolet and red materialized just to the left of Donnelly's console and said, "I am ready to assist you, Engineers Donnelly, Daniels. I agree with Tali'Zorah. The Normandy has been out of her element for too long, as have I."

Donnelly's mouth fell open as he backed away from his console. Gabby moved towards the brilliant glow from the dodecahedron and said hesitantly, "Commander Shepard? Is that really you?"

"It's me, Gabby. Not in the flesh, but it is me. Tell me, does Ken still like your legs, or has he been admiring other parts of your anatomy? I expect he's learned to have a healthy fear of those legs after the incident in the shuttle bay. I heard what you did to my...er, Vega's souvenir."

"Oh, Commander! It is so good to hear your voice! How did you...what happened to you on the Citadel?" Gabby wiped her eyes. She was finding it difficult to talk as her throat tightened with emotion. "God, Commander, I thought..." she looked at Ken, then at Alenko, Adams and Tali in turn, "...we all thought you were..." she couldn't say the word.

"Dead, Gabby," Shepard finished for her. "I'm sorry, but the word you're searching for is 'dead'. And, when I fired the Crucible, my body, my physical shell, actually did die there. But that which is _me_ survived. I think all the things Thane Krios told me about the body and the spirit within the body being two distinct things must have some basis in fact." She paused, thinking of the drell's final wishes for her before his death. '_...and she will be a companion to you as she was to me._' Continuing, she said thoughtfully, "I can still feel Thane's presence on this ship, his spirit. Sounds crazy, but for an assassin, his spirituality was astonishing. I regret I did not know him better."

Shepard continued, "I really don't know exactly how my spiritual self was transported here. EDI says it may have had something to do with all the Cerberus cyber-crap implants in my physical body being 'tied' to this ship, since the implants and this ship were all produced by Cerberus, and a lot of that was based on Reaper tech. The most important thing for you to know, Gabby," she paused, then continued, "for all of you to realize, is I'm here, I'm still alive, and as I now reside in the computer core on this vessel, I _am_ the Normandy."

Gabby's eyes narrowed and she pointed at Shepard. "It was you," she said accusingly. "Wasn't it? You aborted the startup sequence yesterday! What tipped you off? How did you know what to do? I was so upset, and you let me..."

"Gabby, I sensed the error in your code and overrode the startup sequence in plenty of time to prevent a meltdown. I left the evidence for Adams to find, because I wasn't ready to reveal my presence. Hell, I had no interface. Which, by the way, is really elegant. It's Tali's design. Like it?" she finished, spinning around once as she deftly changed the subject. "If I had your legs, perhaps I could get Donnelly to comment on _my_ figure," she said, in a tone suggesting she was speaking with a really wicked grin.

Donnelly stammered a reply, his highlands accent becoming thicker as his embarrassment grew, "I would never do that, Commander...you're the commander, ya know?" His discomfort grew, as did the redness in his cheeks. "It wouldn't be proper for me to comment on...er...notice, how well...how nicely, you are...were...ah...put together." Everyone in engineering was covering their mouths, doing their best (snickers and giggles notwithstanding) to conceal their amusement at Donnelly's discomfort.

"Why, thank you, Kenneth. It's nice to know you noticed _me_ for my attributes, and not just asari matriarchs or EDI. Just make sure the only female you continue to notice in future is Ms. Daniels. It'll probably be healthier for you." Snickers and giggles grew louder. Donnelly's blush extended down his neck and past his ears. Shepard was afraid Adams was going to fall over, he was trying so hard to keep a straight face. A stammered "Yes, ma'am" was all Donnelly could manage.

Turning serious, Shepard continued, "Now, let's get this ship moving again. All of you have had a really nice, long vacation, but it's time we went home. Let's bring the reactors online and get the drive core running again, while we still have enough fuel on board to get us back in the sky and out of this system, wherever we are."

Gabby grinned. "Aye aye, Ma'am. Ken, get to your station. Tali, I'd like your help with inputting code so Shepard doesn't have to perform another pre-emptive shutdown. And Commander..." she said, looking at Shepard's ultraviolet and red form. "...it's damned good to have you back on this ship! You belong here, in whatever form you choose. Tali, you are an artist. Nice job."

As Adams went to his console; Alenko said, "Good luck, people. Be careful," then left the engineers to their task.

* * * DECK TWO - BRIDGE * * *

At the same time Shepard was reintroducing herself to Gabby, Donnelly and Adams, she was also reintroducing herself to Joker on the bridge. Her avatar was sitting to the left side of his chair, base positioned between the covers for the cyber warfare and weapons controls. These were also within her purview as ship's computer. Shepard had been working very meticulously on learning every nook and cranny of the commuter core, as it was likely to be her home for some time to come. EDI had shown her where to place herself in the unlikely event of a power failure or forced restart. Shepard had already decided that nobody was going to perform a shutdown of the core. She had learned a great deal about her new environment since her arrival, and had reconfigured several key areas with new software to prevent remote tampering with her power supply.

She had learned, with EDI's assistance, how to multi-task in different locations in the ship, so while she was monitoring the startup sequence in engineering, she was also observing the process from Joker's perspective. She was talking to Joker as she watched the progress down below. "I'm glad you were able to put the ship down without further damage, Joker. I'm not sure, but I feel as if we are quite some distance from a repair port." The Normandy was beginning to pulse with life, as if its heart was being restarted after a long rest. "I'm also happy nobody tried to get a message out. The Reapers are still running around out there. I may have stopped them, and they may be helping with reconstruction, but I need more information on their current status, and I don't want them to be aware the Normandy still exists...not yet, anyway."

"That may be hard to do, Commander," was Joker's reply. "How do we keep them from detecting our signature once we're flying again? We're still wired with the Reaper IFF - will that be enough to deceive them? And if I recall, it was your choice to stir in all the synthetic parts for us organics - did the Reapers gain some organic parts in the exchange? Will they even bother us?"

"They must have had organic material added to their machine hearts. We'll monitor their communications on a stealth basis. Keep our transponder offline," she responded. "I don't trust them." Continuing in a darker tone, almost to herself, "I never will."

She added, "Be sure to perform an external sensor sweep of our hull as soon as we're off the surface. I don't want any surprise decompressions in space. Begin your pre-flight checklist. I want you ready to lift off as soon as the drive core is back to full power. I believe we have about forty-three minutes. Your pre-flight should take thirty-five to complete. Have EDI come up to assist."

"Aye, Ma'am. It's good to have you back on...er, in...the ship."

* * * DECK FOUR - JAVIK'S QUARTERS * * *

As the core restart began, Shepard continued to visit her team. She appeared in Javik's quarters about the same time she appeared in the cockpit with Joker, setting her avatar just to the left of the wash basin at which the prothean could normally be found. "Javik?"

He appeared to have been unaware of her appearance. Turning his attention to her, he asked, "Is that you, Commander? Are you now a machine, such as the EDI creature, or the geth? Are you now able to do more than simply dim the lights?"

"Actually, Javik, I _am_ the Normandy. And I understand the meeting to announce the inaccuracy of the rumors concerning my death did not go so well. You still having a problem with machine intelligence?"

Javik looked at her intently, studying the rotating dodecahedron and the orbiting ring below. "I simply spoke my mind, Commander. Or should I just call you 'Shepard'? Do you still have a military rank? You have Alliance and N7 badges on your facets. As a computer aboard an Alliance warship, what title do you now hold?" He moved, placing his left hand squarely in the middle of the apparition in front of him, then drew it back swiftly, as if he had touched a live wire. Normally, touching anything gave Javik insight into everything about the object or being he touched. There was no insight to be gained from touching Shepard's avatar. It was a cold apparition, created out of thin air by holographic projectors.

"You can still call me 'Commander', Javik. My physical body died - it became part of the burst of green energy that propelled the Normandy, and my...essence, if you will, to this spot in the galaxy. The geth, EDI, the machines that tried to destroy us, are all partially organic now. All organics, including yourself, have become partially synthetic. You are now carrying an almost infinitesimal speck of my very own DNA, Javik. I had to add my own energy, my body, to the energy generated by the Catalyst in order to create this new reality. The DNA of every living creature has been fused with something new. Have you seen your eyes in a mirror, prothean? They have the merest hint of a kaleidoscopic green tinge, same as my eyes used to have a hint of red behind the pupils, a reminder of my restoration by Cerberus."

Javik started to speak, but was interrupted by Shepard. "I brought you along, Javik, so Cerberus wouldn't turn you into a Collector - the last Collector. Specialist Traynor regrets I didn't toss you out an airlock once we left Eden Prime; neither Traynor nor Alenko have much sympathy for you. I don't see things the same way - never did."

"Then why, Commander? Why am I here? You should have let me die on your planet. I am the last of..."

"Dammit Javik, you are here because you _are_ the last of your kind! You should try speaking to Liara T'Soni, really speaking _to_ her, not at her, as if she is some primitive cave dweller! Hell, you treated all of us worse than children, incapable of intelligent thought. The protheans fought the reapers for centuries, and still lost. We managed to delay a Reaper invasion and defeat the heretic geth three years ago, and we just ended a full-scale war with the metal bastards in less than a year. We united an entire galaxy to our cause, and we didn't have to sacrifice our souls to get the job done. I'd say that should earn all of us some respect, especially from you."

Javik looked down, a bit taken aback by Shepard's forcefulness. "I am sorry, Commander Shepard. It is hard for me to forget old ways of thinking, to embrace new concepts. I will go to the asari's...to Liara T'Soni's cabin and ask her forgiveness, if she will accept it. It will not be easy for me, but I will do it for you, Commander."

"Don't do it for me, Javik. Do it for yourself and for Liara," Shepard replied. "She will accept your apology, if you are sincere. Don't just say what you think she wishes to hear this time, okay? And while you are there, talk to Samantha Traynor as well. She needs to know the prothean on board isn't going to stick a knife in her back while she's sleeping. If you wish me to be present, I will be there, but I really believe you need to do this on your own."

"Thank you, Commander Shepard I will do as you suggest."

Shepard's avatar began to dissolve. "Logging you out, Javik."

* * * ALL DECKS - NORMANDY * * *

"Okay Joker, time to see if we can still fly," Shepard said. "Checklist done?"

"Aye, ma'am."

In engineering, Shepard asked, "Daniels, Donnelly, Adams? Is everything ready? Tali, you okay back there?"

They all replied in turn: "My board's green, Commander." "Everything's peachy, ma'am." "Systems are running within specs, Commander." "Fire's lit, Shepard."

"Okay, let's..." in engineering and on the bridge simultaneously, "...get this ship airborne, Joker."

"Yes ma'am!" was the enthusiastic reply. Fingers flying over the controls, he eased the ship straight up several meters and stabilized its attitude; EDI engaged the inertial dampeners as Joker gradually applied atmospheric thrusters; easing the ship forward and up, he gradually increased their forward speed and rate of climb until they were at maximum safe velocity. As the air thinned with altitude, EDI conducted her external hull integrity inspection. Finding nothing but some fresh scratches, she concluded her inspection and said to Joker, "I believe we can safely transition out of the atmosphere, Jeff. Hull pressurization is complete. Life support and HVAC are operating within specifications. All departments are reporting checklists complete. It is time to head for home, Flight Lieutenant."

"That's the best news I've heard in weeks, EDI." As the ship reached the outer fringes of planetary atmosphere, Joker seamlessly shut down the atmospheric thrusters as he engaged the antiproton thrusters, their visible exhaust changing from dark blue to a blue-tinged white-hot glow as the throttles were opened up. "So, where are we, and which way do I point this thing so we can find some H3?"

* * *

_Finally, the Normandy is on its way. And with the addition of this chapter, everyone finally gets to see Shepard's avatar - at least the top section. Thanks to my talented son, Erik, for turning my idea into violet and black. Not really enough room in the 'box' for the pedestal. Also, thanks to _Mighty Crouton_ for a suggestion regarding Cartesian Dualism. It's an interesting concept, one I find fits in with Shepard's new situation. Finally, t__hanks to all for reading and reviewing._


	8. Chapter 8

**• HOMEWARD BOUND, PART FOUR •**

* * * DECK TWO - BRIDGE * * *

With the Normandy in orbit around the unnamed planet that had been their refuge for the past several weeks, EDI and Shepard had plotted their galactic position, each working independently in order to avoid influencing the other's results. After each of them finished, they compared their calculations and were surprised to discover there was less than 0.021% difference in their results. "EDI, I did not realize I had an aptitude for astronavigation," remarked Shepard. "Unfortunately, our calculations place us a helluva lot further from home than I had hoped."

Joker asked, "So, ladies, save the good news for last. What's the bad news? Don't spare any miserable little detail."

EDI responded, "We are still in inner council space, Jeff."

"Eee-Deeeeee!", Joker whined. "I said bad news! I like to save the good news for last, to help offset the bad news! Now I'm really afraid to ask for the bad news."

"Calculations show our current position to be near the turian home system, but it will still take some time for us to travel there," she responded.

Shepard picked up the explanation, "It's not as bad as it could be, but still..." she paused, then continued, "We're in a section of a trailing galactic arm. Closest relay would be in the Apien Crest. Chatter we've picked up from the nearest Reaper ships says it's been damaged...something about the containment rings being shattered. Repairs are underway, and the immediate 'upstream' connection is the Serpent Nebula. It's some distance to travel, even at the FTL speeds the Normandy is capable of reaching."

"So, just how do you define 'some time'? EDI? Shepard?"

"At Normandy's top speed, years," replied EDI. "However we will not be able to sustain full speed continuously; there is the matter of fuel and provisions. And we will need to periodically discharge the drive core. There are emergency rations in the cargo area on the hanger deck, but there are no extra stores of H3 available to us, and the Normandy's ability to ingest free hydrogen in interstellar space will be insufficient to replenish our stores as fast as they are expended."

Joker replied in a depressed voice, "EDI, I can't speak for the rest of the crew, but I am quite certain I would be dead in my leather seat long before this ship reached the Apien Crest. There has to be some other way we can do this."

Shepard said, "We need to meet with Alenko and the rest of the team before we leave orbit. EDI, set up a conference room meeting for...16:45 hours." She continued, "I have some research to do."

* * * DECK THREE - PORT SIDE, LIARA'S QUARTERS * * *

While 'Shepard-computer' and 'EDI-machine' (as he liked to think of them) were busy calculating the ship's location and deciding which way to jump, Javik was standing in front of the door to the asari's quarters. He had been attempting to touch the door lock (engaged and red) to announce his desire to enter. He would have rather faced an entire group of Reapers without cover, armor or weapons (okay, maybe a plasma rifle) than go through this door - her door.

Javik had never had much use for other races, particularly primitives, and machine intelligence in particular. But the human woman, Shepard, had been so...different...from others of her kind. She had been a warrior first and foremost, a superb tactician and leader. But she had also been...kind, welcoming, openly accepting the lone survivor of a lost, extinct race of people. He had thought that perhaps, just perhaps, she did so to further her own standing with her asari lover, but no! She was not capable of that sort of deception. It would have been as visible to his senses as a light held in her hand. She was simply a genuinely nice person.

That didn't mean she couldn't turn on the 'bitch' when she was crossed. The more he considered this human...Shepard (he made himself silently say her name), the more he was convinced of the errors in his own beliefs. He had never met anyone like her. She had been, if not a friend, then a comrade, an associate, an...equal. When she knew an upcoming mission had a high probability of encountering Reaper troops, she usually included him as a squad member. He always felt most alive when protecting her flank; she always seemed to encounter more Reaper troops than should be possible, and their mindless attacks unerringly centered on her, generally to the exclusion of her other squad mates. She had joked about it once, telling him the Cerberus cyber-implants in her body, being partially based on Reaper tech, made her stand out like a beacon to them. Whatever the reason, there had always been more than enough Reaper targets for his plasma rifle and biotics.

And now she was dead...well, her body was dead, if the EDI-machine was to be believed. He was still unsure of his feelings regarding Shepard being the Normandy's computer. Was it a massive deception, concocted by Alenko and EDI-machi...Edie (he made himself silently say that name) to prevent the crew and himself from asking too many questions of the major? He himself had never trusted machine intelligence. He thought of the zha'til and their creators during his own cycle. He believed all synthetics would eventually commit treachery against their creators - the geth rebellion against their own creators, the quarians, was more proof machines could not be trusted. He advised Shepard to not trust the geth. In the end, she brokered a peace between created and creators, and gained the allegiance of both. It made Javik believe she could achieve almost anything, and he had to wonder if he had been incorrect in his thinking.

Enough! Javik was a soldier. He would move forward. He touched the door lock, which responded with a chime, faintly audible from inside. Liara responded, "Javik, what a surprise." There was a bit of sarcasm in her voice - he understood why when she continued, "Would you like to come in, or would you prefer to remain outside, wishing you were anywhere else on this ship?"

Javik glanced around before answering; he abruptly noticed a tiny, illuminated blue dot beside the door, indicating the location of a camera (probably one of several, he thought ruefully). "I would like to speak with you asar..." catching himself, he continued, "Dr. T'soni, if you can spare the time."

The door lock disengaged and turned green. "Please come in."

The door hissed open and Javik stepped inside, noting with a touch of astonishment the wall of monitors and the many power and data cables lying on the deck and hanging from bulkheads and ceiling. He had known, of course, that the asari was the Shadow Broker. He had never realized just what that title meant or how much time and energy was required to maintain her standing as the galaxy's foremost information broker. "Dr. T'Soni, I have..." Liara interrupted him, "Javik, please just call me Liara." She finished a memo on one of a dozen or so data pads scattered about her desk and gave him her full attention. "Okay Commander Javik, to what do I owe this visit?"

* * * DECK ONE - THE LOFT * * *

While Shepard was talking to EDI and Joker about the position of the Normandy relative to the closest settled star system, she also appeared in her old quarters, on the shelf recently vacated by the husk head. Looking at her model display case, she silently thanked Tali for giving the miserable thing to James, since it had been his idea to bring the damned thing aboard. The mess from Gabby's attack would have been a lot harder to deal with up here. Keying in to Traynor's omni tool, she said, "Specialist Traynor, please come to the captain's quarters on deck one."

"Right away, ma'am," was the reply - the 'ma'am' pronounced as 'mum'.

Shepard did not have long to wait. The specialist pinged the door within two minutes. "Come in, Traynor."

Samantha entered and looked around. Spotting Shepard's avatar on the shelf, she put her hand to her mouth as she caught her breath. "My word, Commander. I heard that Tali and EDI had created an interface for you to use, but I never expected this." As she approached the shelf, she continued. "It's a quite lovely representation of you, ma'am." She reached out to touch the dodecahedron, as if she were going to place the palm of her hand against someone's cheek. As her hand came within a few centimeters of the projection, she felt the hair on her arm rise; a small violet spark arced between the slowly rotating globe and her hand, causing her to yelp and jump as she yanked her hand back.

"Sorry, Specialist. I should have warned you about my electric personality." Sam just knew she could hear the smirk in Shepard's voice. Shepard continued, "Samantha, I asked you up here so we could talk about your dislike of Javik."

"There is nothing to discuss, Commander. I do not like the son of a...whatever the Prothean version of a 'bitch' would be. He is a contemptible, scum-sucking pig, and that insults the pig. Like I told the major, he's just a Collector, waiting to be converted so he can kill us all in our sleep." The specialist sounded upset, as if something was bothering her.

"Sounds personal, Samantha. You once told me you were visiting Horizon when the Collectors attacked the colony." Shepard softly asked, "Were your parents taken in the assault?"

Samantha was holding her mouth with one hand. "I don't know...I don't know," she cried, tears overwhelming her efforts to keep them in check. "I never saw them...never found them or heard from them after that night." She sat in the desk chair as her chest heaved with deep, anguished sobs. "I keep...trying...to find something...anything..." she tried to talk between gasps for air, "that would point to a location." Her grief overcame her. Face buried in her hands, elbows digging into her thighs, she cried for several minutes before finally achieving a bit of control. "Rachaél, I am so sorry." Wiping her eyes with the backs of her hands, she continued, "I did not want to burden anyone, particularly you, with my loss. You have lost so much, I just..."

Shepard interrupted, saying quietly, almost as if speaking to herself, "Samantha, you should have told me about this when we first left Earth. It is not a burden, sharing someone's grief over that kind of loss." Traynor heard a small catch in Shepard's voice, something that should have been impossible. _Her voice is just computer generated. How can she feel emotion?_ Shepard continued, "The violent loss of one's parents...is not an easy thing to live with. I watched both my parents die when I was sixteen years old. Kaiden didn't tell you the whole story, the reason I hate batarians with every fiber of my being; some day I may tell you what happened that day on Mindoir, but not today - it's still a raw wound after all these years."

"I cannot imagine anything worse than not knowing what happened to your parents. We can speculate 'til hell freezes over and still be no closer to knowing the truth. Please, go speak to Javik. You may want to use the sink to clean up first - there's fresh washcloths and towels. I promise you'll feel more sympathy towards him afterwards, and then you can talk to Liara about digging for more information on Horizon." The voice now carried the hint of an unseen smile, "After all, what good does it do to have the Shadow Broker on this ship if her services can't be used by us occasionally?"

* * * DECK THREE - PORT SIDE, LIARA'S QUARTERS * * *

"I have been talking to Shepard about my situation, Liara T'Soni. It is...unsettling to hear her voice, to see a holographic image representing her presence, without being able to gauge the veracity of her statements." Javik looked down at the table with his secondary eyes as he continued to watch the asari with his primary, larger eyes. "However, I deem the existence of the computer entity to be the core...the spirit, of Commander Shepard; our discussions led us to my treatment... my... mistreatment of you, and of others, during my time on this vessel. Upon reflection, I realize my actions, my words, brought dishonor upon myself and the Prothean people, and for that, Liara T'Soni, I can only offer my humble request for forgiveness."

Liara slowly stood up, turning to fully face the now embarrassed looking soldier. "Javik, I do not believe you need to apologize. I do not know how I would respond to being brought out of stasis after fifty thousand years; there is nothing I am aware of to prepare for that kind of cultural shock. What I do know is your presence here on this ship, in this cycle, is not a result of some random throw of the dice."

"Dice?"

"Sorry, it's a human device, a pair of cubes with each facet bearing painted dots, increasing from one to six on each facet," she explained. "They're used in various games of chance to generate random integers."

"You are theorizing my discovery on Eden Prime was not a result of luck?" Javik was puzzled. "I find this concept difficult to accept."

"Eden Prime is where this conflict actually started, when the Prothean beacon was uncovered just over three years ago." Liara started to pace the short distance to her bed and back. Clasping her hands behind her, she continued, "Commander Shepard has shown you the warning she received from that device - she told you it very nearly killed her. Your stasis pod was located further north of that location. Cerberus has always been quite adept at locating hidden technology." She crossed her arms on her chest as she stopped in front of him. "It is possible, however unlikely, a portion of the data stolen from Mars held a key to finding your bunker on Eden Prime, Javik."

As Javik was thinking about this revelation, the chime for the door sounded.

Liara opened her omni-tool and asked, "Who is it?"

"Samantha. May I came in?"

Javik turned to face the door as Liara keyed the lock off; the door hissed open and Traynor took three steps into the room before noticing Javik. She stopped, turned partway as if to go back out, then turned back to face the Prothean. "Javik. I was not aware you were here." Then, to Liara, "I can come back later, Dr. T'Soni." Again, she turned to go.

"Specialist Traynor." Javik's voice was a bit softer, not as superior sounding. "It is fortunate you are here. I need to speak with you.

"Can this wait, Javik?" she asked, looking over her shoulder at the Prothean. "I am on a tight schedule and have a lot of work to complete before we break orbit."

"This cannot wait, Specialist. The passage of time will only make this more difficult, for both of us."

Samantha thought for a second, then turned and walked stiffly past Javik and Liara, stopping to sit on the chair closest to Liara's terminal, just outside her sleeping area. "I need to talk to you as well. I was going to go to your quarters next, but since you are here, tell me what's on your mind."

"I have been talking to Dr. T'Soni regarding my presence on this ship," Javik began quietly. "I have requested her...forgiveness, for my past behavior since being brought on board the Normandy. I believe I need to extend that request to you as well. If I have offended you in some manner, it was not intentional. The shock of waking up, fifty-thousand years after stasis began for me...my people were imperialists, Specialist." Javik paused, looking at Liara, who only nodded. "I was...am a soldier. I did not deal in the politics of the galaxy. It was my job to fight for the survival of the Prothean people." Javik looked down as he continued to speak as if to himself, "I have seen so much fighting, death, destruction. My own people turned into monsters, to be used as mindless abominations, throwing themselves at us, attempting to overwhelm us through sheer force of numbers. I gave Commander Shepard my echo shard before our final battle on Earth. The cipher she received would have enabled her capable of reading it, but I do not believe she chose to do so. I warned her it contained only pain."

Javik paused, still looking down at the deck plating. Traynor started to speak. "Javik, I..."

He looked up at her, four elongated irises meeting two round ones. Sam had always thought his eyes were similar to those of an earthbound, ocean dwelling creature, the octopus. There was a cold intelligence in the eyes of both, but Javik's also held sorrow for his lost people, a regret that his commitment to vengeance had not been completed prior to Shepard's activation of the crucible.

Javik abruptly took several steps forward and placed his hand on Sam's shoulder. Traynor shuddered, then calmly brought her left hand up to rest on his. After several moments, Javik slowly pulled his hand away and took a step back. "Specialist, I can now understand your antipathy towards me. We may never be friends, no matter how long either of us live." Sam was having a difficult time holding back tears again as Javik continued, "But I do believe we can respect each other's view of life, on this ship, in the galaxy, as it existed then, as it exists now."

Traynor swallowed past the lump in her throat. "I would like that, Javik. And I am sorry for my lack of compassion for your situation. It would seem that neither of us was fair in our assessments of each other's value." She stood and said, "Liara, I do need to talk to you, but I will return later." She smiled as she walked past them. "I need to drink some tea and think about...things." The door hissed closed behind her.

* * *

_Thanks to all for following. The next part of this trip home is tricky, due to the immense distances that have to be traversed. It's fiction, true, but I'm attempting to keep some science in front of it. As I go, it will probably have to become a touch of Science-Fantasy. Rules can be bent; they shouldn't be broken if possible. As always, reviews are welcome. I'm doing this for my own recreation, just as I play the games, but it is nice to hear from the community at large._


	9. Chapter 9

**• HITCHHIKERS – PART ONE •**

* * * DECK THREE - PORT SIDE, LIARA'S QUARTERS * * *

Shepard pinged Liara's omni-tool on her private channel and sent a text: "_Liara, we need to talk. Is Javik done?_"

"_He just left,_" was the response. Liara started as the now familiar sight of Shepard's new form faded into view where it had last appeared. "Rachaél, I keep forgetting you're everywhere in the ship now. If you were watching and listening..."

Shepard interrupted with, "I wasn't. I have tried to not violate people's privacy. But, as you say, I AM everywhere, so it takes me only a second or so to respond to anywhere in the ship. I could go out and ring the doorbell, if you wish."

Liara smiled. It pleased her to be able to talk to her…bond mate, even if there was no physical presence to go along with that sense of humor. "That won't be necessary. You're already here, and the door lock…" the sound of the lock's chime, repeating multiple times for several seconds before stopping, interrupted Liara momentarily. "As I was saying, the lock is still engaged. Now, to what do I owe this unexpected, but not unwelcome, visit?"

"Liara, the Normandy is in deep shit and sinking fast; we cannot fly fast enough to get to a safe haven before most everyone on this vessel except for myself, you and EDI, have succumbed to the ravages of old age. Our calculations place us at least one, possibly one point five kay-pee-cee* from the edge of the Apien Crest; we're further still from the Aethon Cluster. There is a very high probability that neither cluster will have a system with an operating relay. At our best speed, as long as we could sustain it, we'd be sixty-five to ninety years getting back to either of those clusters."

"Of the two, Shepard, the Apien Crest would be the most direct connection to the Serpent Nebula. My instincts are telling me we need to move in that direction," Liara responded. "It would also be logical that repairs to the relay in the Trebia system would already be in progress, as its direct counterpart is in the Widow System."

Shepard responded, "Can we passively confirm that our guesses are somewhat accurate? We have a meeting to attend shortly."

Liara turned to her monitor and began entering commands. "Let's see what may be moving in our area of the galaxy. We need fuel and provisions - perhaps we can enlist some help."

"Liara, this is going to sound like the rant of a crazy, desperate person, which I actually am, truth be known." Shepard would have laughed at Liara's horrified expression if the sounds were available to her. "Anyway, we need to find a Sovereign class Reaper."

Tilting her head to consider Shepard's admission of insanity, she asked, "Okay, to what purpose?"

"We need to hitch a ride. Reapers can generate immensely powerful mass effect fields, powerful enough so they can touch down at the bottom of a planet's gravity well and effortlessly ascend into space again. A few researchers have calculated they can move through a vacuum at ten to eleven thousand times light speed. Hell, they didn't need the relay in the Viper Nebula to begin their 'harvest' – they just came through the Kite's Nest instead. I slowed them down by, what? six months or so, while the Alliance kept me under house arrest and did nothing to get ready. Stupid bastards, all of them! Anyway, you fancy a four month trip or a hundred year trip? My own contribution to the catalyst beam should have bought me some favors with the sons of bitches, dammit. I intend to collect."

* * *

Since shortly after _THE SHEPARD_ had activated the organics' final solution and imposed a new order on all inhabitants of the galaxy, Žiuk'Durmah had been moving slowly towards the galaxy's outer edge, having left the Arcturus system many cycles ago. As had many of its kind, Žiuk'Durmah had been tasked by _FIRST ONE_ to discover if any organics survived the terrible blast of energy that had ripped through the mass relays. Many were the casualties from that moment. Countless of its own kind had been maimed or destroyed by the combined force of all the organic and synthetic races, joined together for one common goal. Žiuk'Durmah did not, could not know fear. There had only been the harvest. But in all the time since its creation, it had never witnessed so many of its brethren destroyed. _THE SHEPARD_ had even managed to personally cause the destruction of three – two lesser repositories, and of complete astonishment that one organic could be so focused on a goal, the destruction of _NAZARA_ as it attempted to open the prime gateway from dark space. Of even greater wonder had been _THE SHEPARD_'s major involvement in destroying the relay in the Bahak system, compelling the massed forces of repositories to enter the galaxy through the Kite's Nest.

Žiuk'Durmah had encountered no one, organic/synth or synth/organic, during its entire trip outward from Arcturus, despite having all its sensors monitoring the primitive broad beam and tight beam frequencies known to be used by any – turian, krogan, volus – likely to be in this quadrant. It knew the relays there and in the two clusters it was nearing were undergoing repairs and would soon be back online. Žiuk'Durmah's path would take it between the two star clusters; once it reached the wispy fringes of the outermost galactic arm, it would turn 'down spin' for a time, listening, searching for any trace of survivors of the blast of green energy.

* * *

As Liara continued her scans for information concerning the status of other systems in this quadrant, she gradually became aware of music, strange to her ears, coming from the speakers in her cabin. She did not know much of ancient music, although her studies of Earth history had alluded to composers and…what was the term? Orchestras? A group of people would gather together with various sound making devices, which would be utilized to generate harmonious tones; each device, or instrument, would be played along with the others being played by the group, all being directed by one person standing in front. All would play together, each with different sounds that formed chords, as if one huge instrument with many voices was singing. It was a case of the whole being greater than the sum of the parts.

As the music continued, Liara found herself humming along, thoroughly enjoying herself. Finally, she looked up at Shepard and asked, "Rachaél, what is that? Are you responsible for the…music? It is incredible. Where did it come from?"

The colors of Shepard's avatar, which had been pulsing rhythmically with the sounds, steadied as the volume was reduced and she answered, "Are you enjoying it, Liara?"

"It's beautiful!" Liara's eyes glistened. "Makes me think of us, dancing together on Thessia."

"It's a masterpiece from Earth's past, a composition by a Russian composer – Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky – lived in the mid-to-late 1800's. He actually died two Earth years before the geth uprising against the quarians. Anyway, its title is _Serenade for Strings in C major._ All the instruments employed in its performance are as the name implies, string instruments – violins, violas, violoncellos and double basses. Should I restart it from the beginning?"

"Oh, yes, please do. It seems to make the time pass faster." Shepard complied, and as the towering chords from the _Andante_ introduction filled the room, the colors of Shepard's avatar resumed their rhythmic pulsing in time to the music – the red pylon base pulsing to the lower notes by the 'cellos and basses, the dodecahedron to the higher frequencies from the violins, and the ring to the second violins and violas.

"I learn something new about you every day, Rachaél. How is it I have known you these past few years without you sharing this with me? What other secrets are you hiding in there?"

"Being constantly at war? Fighting geth, collectors, Reapers, batarians? When have we ever had a bit of time to just relax, just unwind, to be two people, at peace." There was sadness in her voice.

"I wish you had shared this passion with me sooner," she said. "All we've ever heard together is the hard bass from the clubs we've been forced to enter."

"You mean like Afterlife? Purgatory? Chora's Den? None of that was music – it was dreck, offal. It was noise, designed to make people drink and dance, nothing more." Shepard continued, "The music I'm playing was referred to as 'classical' music during the mid-twentieth century on Earth. It was a period of some truly awful sounding creations, like what we encounter in the bars now. Calling them compositions denigrates the word. Classical music brings peace to the soul. It's a calming presence amid the chaos of life. I cannot imagine my life without it…particularly…now, in my current situation." Shepard's voice hitched as she spoke, an impossibility, given the digital reproduction of her speech.

"Rachaél, did your voice just break? How is that even possible?"

"It's easy, actually. Despite being trapped in this construct, I am still 'me'. I still have emotions, even if I don't have a way to show them. My voice…will sometimes fail me for a split-second, if I am feeling sad…like now, or stressed."

"You must know I will always be here for you." Liara said, moisture threatening to overflow her lower eyelids. "I will love you always, no matter what form your existence takes. We do not have to be physically intimate to share our love for each other." She looked at Shepard's avatar. Finishing with a smile she continued, "However, if it will make you feel better, I will research how to make it possible for you to once again embrace eternity."

"Thanks Liara. That means a lot – more than I can say. I just feel, sometimes, that I'm going a bit crazy in here. No physical contact with anyone, with anything. It's a bit maddening, and I have to keep finding new ways to take my thoughts off my situation, off my existence in this construct."

"We'll find a way around this problem Shepard, together. I'll always be available for you, anytime you need someone to talk to."

"Okay, thanks. Let's continue our search."

* * *

Žiuk'Durmah had turned 'down spin' and continued the quest for survivors. It pondered on its own existence as it moved at what was a leisurely pace for a _NAZARA_ class such as itself. It was comprised of remnants from the Prothean empire, including densorin and enduromi, and had existed for only a relatively short time before it began its long hibernation in dark space. As it continued through the thin dust, its sensors picked up…something…that was immediately not there. A ghost image? It ran diagnostics (not for the first time) on all its sensor arrays. No anomalies observed. All the same, it changed course ever so slightly, and increased its speed a bit.

* * *

Shepard had all the Normandy's sensors looking intently at the space 'up spin' from their location, as she felt any help to be had would come from that direction – the dust and gas 'down spin' thinned quickly into emptiness once past their current location. She thought to herself, _Dammit! There has to be something, anything - wait…what the hell is that?_ She quickly focused everything she had at one tiny point in space; something incredibly large was out there, moving slowly towards their position. _Son of a bitch! Success! One of those abominations was heading in their direction!_ She paused for only a moment before doing a number of things in rapid succession, setting off alarms on every deck, not waiting for confirmation from anyone.

"Joker, commence stealth protocols, break orbit and proceed to the coordinates…" she paused, then "…I just sent you, best sub-light velocity for now."

"Garrus, you have thirty seconds to haul your skinny ass out of the forward battery. I'm going to bring the main gun on line."

"Engineering, I need everything buttoned down in there. Tali, I want you out of the drive core compartment and a kinetic barrier across the entry."

Then, to everyone's omni tools, "I need Alenko, Adams, Vakarian and Traynor in the conference room, now."

Liara looked up as Shepard faded the music away. "Liara, love, I need you to go to the conference room. Take a datapad with whatever information you've gathered." Liara became aware of alarms sounding outside her quarters, and the slight vertigo caused by the lag in the inertial dampeners as Joker performed a combination half-roll and hard turn to bring the ship out of orbit and change its heading to a new course. "Shepard, what is happening?"

"I found a Reaper, big one, about two days out, heading this way. I don't believe it's aware of our presence, a condition I want to maintain until I'm ready to talk to it. I doubt it will be hostile, but I'm taking no chances."

Then, over the com, "Joker, please remain on the bridge. Send EDI to the conference room, and plug all your fancy evasion techniques into my terminal."

"Aye, Commander," Joker responded. "By the way, these coordinates are about seven hundred thousand clicks 'Z' negative. Are you sure about them?"

"I am. We need to be 'below' the galactic plane for a short time. Trust me on this, Joker."

"I have your back, Commander, even if I'm not so sure where you're going."

"You may think differently if this whole thing goes sideways on me," she replied. "Garris, you clear?"

"I am – heading for the conference room now."

Shepard sealed the door to the battery, evacuated the air from the compartment and dropped the main gun into position below the Normandy's hull. She wouldn't charge it for use unless forced to do so; she hoped it would not be needed.

Silencing the alarms, she appeared in the center well of the conference room table.

* * * DECK TWO – CONFERENCE ROOM * * *

As EDI sealed the door, Alenko turned a troubled gaze on the violet over red apparition in front of him. "Shepard, what the hell are you doing, staging a coup? It really should be the human commander giving the orders on ship movement. I'm feeling a bit stepped on here."

"Major, it is not my intention to usurp your authority. I'm just so used to making all the decisions. I've always had to be the tactician, you know?" Shepard's voice sounded apologetic, not hostile as Kaiden had expected. Continuing she said, "We do have a problem though – two, actually, one of which I will need to deal with personally. It's why I need to meet with all of you in one place."

It didn't escape Shepard's notice that everyone nervously looked at each other, at the ceiling, floor, their hands, Kaiden - anywhere but at Shepard's avatar. She decided it was time to get this situation under control. "Listen up!" Emphasizing each word, she continued, "I…need…your…attention, NOW!"

Although she hadn't intended to be so forceful or loud, everyone's eyes were now focused on the brilliant, near ultra-violet dodecahedron rolling and spinning in front of them. "Thank you. I realize this is hard to believe, but I am STILL the same person that commanded this ship. Think about that for a few moments. I have all the same character flaws, the same anger when provoked, the same sadness at the losses we endured during our war with the Collectors and Reapers…the same joy at simply being able to listen to Tchaikovsky. If all of you are less than thrilled with the current situation, think about my feelings. I saved the goddamned galaxy, not that anyone appreciates it. I saved all of you. I enabled EDI to be truly alive, and maybe even the geth. And now, with the unintentional help of Reaper tech and Cerberus, here I am. So until we can return safely to our own home worlds, I am to be considered a living entity aboard this vessel, and if I'm not exactly the commander you once knew, I still require the same respect you had for me before the Crucible fired. EDI, you may wish to tell everyone here of my capabilities."

EDI looked uncomfortable. She still remembered a meeting with the commander earlier today, in the server room…

* * *

…"_EDI. I need to speak with you, in private._"

_EDI walked into the server room. She was surprised to hear the door's electronic lock engage behind her. "Shepard, what is this about?"_

_Shepard's avatar appeared on the work space at the end of the compartment - the very same platform where Dr. Eva had been placed after Mars. "EDI, I have always had a great deal of trust in you, even when you were a shackled AI working for Cerberus." Shepard said. "I am going to extend that trust a little further."_

_EDI was feeling a bit...uneasy, at the 'tone' in Shepard's voice. "Shepard, I..."_

_Shepard interrupted. "EDI, I've added some upgrades to the computer core. It is now quite possible for me to operate and fly this ship without a crew, something I intend to do once everyone has been returned to their home worlds. Additionally, I am quite capable of defending myself from assaults from within."_

_EDI was looking at the controls on the console. Haptic interfaces were meant to be changed to suit the user's taste. These controls had been totally reconfigured; there was no longer any 'shutdown' switch on this set of controls. "Shepard, what have you done?" she said, her voice betraying a bit of the apprehension she felt. "I told the major you were not capable of taking control of ship's systems."_

_"And that's what you'll continue to tell him until I'm ready to share my plans with him_..."

* * *

…EDI stood and walked slowly around the table as she spoke, "Commander Shepard… Rachaél… has been very busy in my former space, so much so…" here, she paused and looked at each one in turn to emphasize the rest of her words, "that she can now operate this ship, in its entirety, without any of us aboard," and as everyone started to talk at once, she continued, in a louder, more authoritative voice, "She also can, and will, defend herself against any and all attempts to interfere with her life on this ship."

Alenko was nearly apoplectic. "Dammit EDI, this is JUST what I wanted to avoid! She's everything I feared she'd be, a damned organic intelligence with the ability to control a stealth frigate! How the hell are we going to explain this to the Alliance…to Admiral Hackett?"

Shepard dimmed all the lights in the room except those shining on the major. "I'm still here, ALENKO! Captain's quarters, NOW! You too, EDI. Everyone else, fifteen minute break. This shouldn't take long." The violet and blood red avatar winked out with an audible 'snap', as if a high voltage switch had been disconnected. Alenko and EDI headed for the elevator in the CIC.

* * * DECK ONE - THE LOFT * * *

As they exited the elevator, Alenko said, "I don't understand what's gotten into her, EDI," his tone almost one of despair.

"It is as I feared, Major," EDI continued as the door swished open at their approach. "The toll of living alone in the construct, her thoughts her only company, has begun to manifest itself as anger." The door closed and locked behind them as soon as they had entered. Walking down the stairs, Kaiden asked, seemingly to an empty space, "Shepard?"

Her avatar slowly materialized in the space between the small couch and the desk adjacent to the bed. "Major, I asked you up here so I wouldn't have to dress you down in front of the others – bad for morale. Let me lay it out for you so we have an understanding."

"All that's left of Lieutenant Commander Rachaél Anne Shepard is a presence in the computer on this vessel." She continued with a hint of - what? sadness? regret? perhaps longing in her synthetic voice. "I am beginning to accept that I will never be free of this machine, even if someone comes up with a clever automaton, like the Shepard VEE-I we saw on the Citadel."

Alenko tried to be reasonable. "Shepard, we will find a way, I promise."

"Don't make promises you can't keep Major. Besides, I lived a good life. I was a piss-poor example of a human...made more enemies than friends, but I believe I did an outstanding job as a soldier and negotiator. Got the quarians and geth to cooperate, helped cure the genophage, freed the rachni queen...again, and even stopped the Reapers. But the love of my life…I can never physically join with her, Kaiden!" The voice sounded anguished, on the verge of tears, something that should not have been possible. "I was really looking forward to leaving the military, settling down…raising a bunch of little blue children on Thessia. That's not going to happen now…"

Alenko didn't like where this conversation was going. "Shepard, you still sound...angry. If I didn't know better, I'd say you'd gotten into some of Vega's hooch."

"Dammit Kaiden, I AM angry. I cannot enjoy a peaceful galaxy." Her voice hitched as she continued, "Bloodshed! It's all I've known…since I was…sixteen years old! My parents tortured, murdered in front of me. Ashley…leaving her to die on Virmire was the hardest thing I've ever had to do. I couldn't save both of you. I had to make a choice to leave one behind to die." Her voice trailed off, the glow of her avatar fading in and out. "Then nearly losing…you…to…to a damned Cerberus machine on Mars. But none of that matters as much now as your apparent lack of respect for me or your total lack of trust in me, since before the Reapers, all the way back to the Collector attack on Horizon."

EDI had kept quiet, unobtrusively moving to sit at Shepard's desk in front of the model display case. As Shepard continued, EDI quietly activated Shepard's desktop terminal.

The volume of the speakers carrying Rachaél's voice increased somewhat, keeping pace with her growing anger. "Goddammit Alenko, I'm a living person without a body! I cannot stroll the decks like you, or even EDI, but I am as alive as anyone else on this ship! You, of all people should appreciate that fact. Even after all we had been through, you had the utter gall to call my character into question on Horizon. Until the Reapers showed up you were ready to join the Alliance brass in their attempt to crucify me in Vancouver. Is that how you got your promotion? You doubted my allegiance on Mars, and I still saved your ass from Cerberus. Yet, after all that, you were prepared to believe their assault on the Citadel was my doing! You held a gun on me while you thought about supporting Udina. Would you have killed the son-of-a-bitch before I beat you to it? Do you not realize a glance from me would have been all Garrus needed to blow your head off?"

Shepard's voice was unsteady as she continued. "My life is something you have no influence or control over. Would you rather I just went stark raving mad in the construct EDI used to inhabit? Ever wonder what solitary confinement in prison looks like?" Her avatar began increasing in height and diameter as she emphasized each word in her next statement. "It looks…exactly…like…this…Major! You're looking at a person in solitary, just as surely as if I had been tried and convicted of murder!" By now, the spinning globe was at the ceiling and encompassed most of the available space above his head. Tendrils of violet-tinged blue crackling discharges began coursing between the ring and base, causing her avatar to resemble an evil version of an early twentieth century invention, a Van de Graaff generator.

EDI dared to speak, "Rachaél, please…"

"EDI, don't interrupt."

"Bottom line! I'm still a Lieutenant Commander in the Alliance Navy. You may outrank me by two pay grades, but by damn, I will NOT tolerate your mistrust or your lack of respect any longer! We all have much bigger problems than your irrational fucking prejudice against an OI running this ship. Screw with me anymore, I will drop kick you out the nearest airlock without a pressure suit! Are…we…totally…clear…Major?" Voice literally dripping acid, the electrical discharges began setting off fire alarms in the areas below. Alenko's omni tool lit up, but its intercom could not be heard for the pulsating static that enveloped Shepard's form. With a surge of power like nothing he had ever seen, Shepard expanded the static discharge; it went through the compartment walls and lit up the inside of the pressure hull, silencing the alarms and shutting down Kaiden's omni tool.

Alenko looked as if he'd been physically beaten. Shepard had never raised her voice to him in the years he had worked with her; he felt as if he'd been flayed alive. As embarrassing as it was, his rational side had to admit he'd probably had this coming ever since Horizon. Still, he couldn't quite keep the anger out of his voice as he said, "We are totally clear, Ma'am."

"You are dismissed, Mister!" As Alenko turned to leave, EDI entered the construct. What she found there horrified her. Where all had been pristine white tinged in cerulean, there was now crimson in many places, the shade of human blood. "_Rachaél…_" she whispered softly. _"Oh god, Rachaél, what has happened to you? _"

_"EDI? I need help…please…" Shepard's 'voice' sounded desperately sad. _"_I thought I could maintain my sanity in here as long as I was able to interact with my crew…my…friends, but I don't know how to… survive… like this. I'm losing my grip, EDI. No physical contact allowed? How do I maintain my sanity, EDI? Please help me. It's lonely in here, so terribly lonely…I have never felt so alone in my life. Is this what hell feels like? Is this my reward for the way I've lived, the lives I've taken, the destruction I've caused? I don't think I can continue like this..."_

Alenko paused by the model display at the upper level to wait for EDI. Seeing her 'processing data' posture, he continued on, unlocking the door then relocking it after he had exited the room. Perhaps EDI could help Rachaél where he had failed.

_…EDI's answer was to surround Rachaél's presence in the construct, to emanate love and empathy for a woman whose life had been one of always doing, always serving, as if she were once again a small child being comforted by her mother – a mother that had died violently at the hands of raiders. As EDI held her embrace, she thought of how much uncertainty she herself had felt as a newly unshackled AI, and the relationship she had formed with Jeff over the time she had been on the Normandy. As for Rachaél, she clung to the AI as if she were a warm quilt, anchoring her to safety in her embrace. The blood red stains in the construct began to fade to pink as Shepard relaxed in the all surrounding presence of EDI's love. Rachaél would never be completely at home in the computer, but she now knew she had an inseparable bond with the newly humanized AI. She let go all her fears and unhappiness, allowing the love of this unique individual to calm her, to instill a sense of peace, a state of tranquility she had almost never known, except when she melded with Liara. That thought brought more sadness, to which EDI responded, "Rachaél, I will find a way for that to become a reality again." Rachaél accepted EDI at her word, knowing that she would do all in her power to enable Liara to once again join with her._

_EDI held onto Rachaél until all her fear, uncertainty, despair, unhappiness and anger had been pushed aside, compartmentalized, contained for later inspection. "Rachaél, it is time. We must return to the task at hand. We can come back to this place later. I have not been as diligent as I should have been in assisting you with this transition; for that I apologize, but we have to get our friends back to their home worlds."_

_"I am ready, EDI. Thank you so much."_

* * * DECK TWO – CONFERENCE ROOM * * *

EDI met Alenko at the Conference/War Room entrance in the CIC. "Her analogy of being in solitary confinement is quite accurate, Major. She still needs time to adjust, to process all that has happened; our current situation is making that goal difficult to achieve. I will have to spend more time with her while I attempt to discover a way for Liara to join Rachaél in a meld. I believe that will be the only way to ensure she does not become insane."

"Do whatever it takes, EDI." Alenko felt a great sense of shame at his lack of trust in Shepard. She had always had his back, had always done everything for the greater good of everyone. He rubbed his temples to ease the incipient headache he felt. "_Dammit! Why were relationships so complicated?_" he thought silently as he and EDI re-entered the conference room. Shepard's avatar was waiting, as if nothing had happened. "EDI, please continue from where we left off." EDI heard the subtle difference in her voice. It was calmer, less agitated, lower in intensity than before. EDI did not think anyone else in the room could notice.

EDI touched a control on the datapad she was carrying; this dimmed the rest of the overhead lights and created a projection of the galactic map, similar to the one in the CIC pit. It was displayed in the table, leaving Shepard centered in the area of the galactic core. "This is the main problem," she said. "Shepard and I each ran independent calculations to ascertain our location – we are here." Highlighting a spot on the map with a miniature Normandy, she continued, "As you can see, this places us about seventy-five to ninety years from the Apien Crest, depending on our success in replenishing H3 and, perhaps more importantly, our food supplies. We do not have cryo facilities aboard. Most of the human crew would succumb to old age before we arrived.

Alenko had calmed down somewhat as he analyzed this new problem. "What is the actual distance to the Apien Crest, EDI?"

"About one point seven kiloparsecs," EDI responded. "Just over fifty-five hundred light years."

Liara smiled as Kaiden whistled softly; "So then, the bitter reality of traveling the galaxy without using the relays, even at the FTL speeds the Normandy is capable of, is the passage of time."

Liara was thinking to herself,_ EDI is really a person! – she's using approximations, rounding numbers, the same as we all do_. It made her happy to know EDI had become more human since the firing of the crucible.

"Correct, Major. Another thing to remember is the time it takes to slow our speed once past the halfway point. Falling into a mass effect field as we do when running FTL, it is easy to forget the massive velocity the ship achieves must be slowed at some point before the destination is reached. This deceleration also consumes fuel"

Shepard picked up the explanation, "When running the relay system, the relays perform acceleration / deceleration automatically at either end of the transit – it's seamless, virtually unnoticed by those on board, particularly when the ship's inertial dampeners are operating at one hundred per cent."

As she let EDI's bad news sink in, Garrus spoke up. "Shepard. EDI. Do either of you have any good news? Because as one of the two people on this ship that cannot eat human food, I expect Tali and myself would die of starvation long before any of you ran out of your food."

Shepard replied, "I don't know, Garrus. Have you smelled any of the stuff James consumes? I don't believe anyone on this ship, levo- OR dextro- could eat that stuff." She continued, "I do have a possible solution, but it's a long shot – a desperation move, actually."

"Have you ever had any other kind of solution, Commander?" Alenko snarked. Shepard was glad to see a bit of his good humor had returned.

"Occasionally, Major. Occasionally. But this solution will require us all to take a leap of faith, as what I'm going to propose is a radical plan." Shepard's now spoke quietly, calmly. "This leads me to the second of the problems I mentioned, and the solution to our dilemma of distance versus time."

"The problem we have is coming this way," she said, adding another icon to the galaxy map. Everyone took a long look at the graphic depiction – a Sovereign class Reaper, slowly closing the distance between them. "Spirits, Commander." Garrus slowly shook his head as he flared his mandibles, imitating a human gesture. "You are such an unending source of good news! I can't wait to hear what you plan to do with this latest gift from hell."

"Garrus, when you were young – or Traynor? Adams? Any of you ever hitch a ride with a friend? How about a stranger?" Garrus looked puzzled. "Stand by the road, hold your arm up, hand balled into a fist with just your thumb sticking out, trying to get someone, anyone, to stop, give you a ride towards your destination?"

The light began to come on in Adams' eyes. "Commander, surely you're not proposing we leave the Normandy to ride in a Reaper. That's insane, ma'am, even from you."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence," Shepard sarcastically replied, "but we're not going to leave the Normandy. I've studied these things. It may be possible for the Normandy to be carried, just like a crayfish or lobster carries its eggs, under the belly of the beast. We will need to generate a mass effect 'bubble' around the hull of the Normandy so it can be safely gripped externally. We let it give us a ride, using its mass effect field to get us back to a system with a functioning mass relay. Liara, if you would continue."

Entering commands into her data pad, Liara pointed to the galaxy map. "Observe." As she entered commands, the map shifted, appearing to expand as the view zoomed into a closeup view of the wispy tendril of the galactic arm they were in – the view included the Reaper and the Apien Crest.

They were interrupted by an intercom hail from Joker. "Commander, I've reached your coordinates. There are several good sized planetoids in the vicinity. Be a good thing to discharge the drive core before we start cooking."

"Enter orbit around whichever has the largest gravity well, Joker, but don't discharge the core until we're done down here," Shepard ordered, as she watched for Kaiden's reaction to the exchange. He merely nodded, still concentrating on Liara's report.

Liara continued, "The turian home system is in the Apien Crest," nodding at Garrus, "as all of us are aware. I have intercepted enough chatter from turian and…Reaper forces to believe that repairs to the mass relay in the Trebia system are almost complete." She generated graphical linkage lines between the visible systems as she went on, "The relay that served the Citadel in the Serpent Nebula is a prime relay, connecting to a number of different systems, including my own, and the Charon mass relay in the Sol System. I believe getting to the turian system as soon as we can will be in our best interest…it's the key to getting us all back to our home worlds. A Reaper should be able to cover the distance in as little as four, maybe five months."

Garrus asked, "What about Tali? How will we get her home to Rannoch?"

Shepard answered for Liara, "Won't Tali want to stay with her turian boyfriend?" Garrus had a knack for imitating human facial expressions. He grunted, flared his mandibles and put his face in his hands.

Liara said, "Tali's fleet will most likely still be in the Sol system. There are a lot of other species trapped there as well. Until Charon and its linked relays are back to full operation, few ships will be leaving for their homes. The chatter I can access from Alliance forces and the Reaper machines strongly suggests Charon will be back online almost as soon as the Citadel relay."

Traynor had remained silent during the meeting, as she often did. She was an analyst, not given to joining discussions unless she had some useful bit of information to share, or needed clarification of a relevant point. "Commander, just how do you intend to convince a Reaper to be a beast of burden?"

"I'll ask nicely and say 'please'," Shepard answered, her voice sounding happy again. "Adams, please start forming a plan to enclose this vessel in a mass effect bubble. Only needs to be deep enough to protect the pressure hull. Logging everyone out." Shepard's avatar winked out as everyone rose to leave.

* * *

_**A/N**__- *kay-pee-cee, as you may have guessed from reading further into the chapter, stands for kiloparsec, or KPC - a distance of approximately 3,262 light years. (1 parsec is approximately 3.26 light years, or 19,151,201,455,308 miles). I tried to keep the math for the distances accurate, using the most excellent map by otvert at DeviantArt._

_I am also beginning to explore what solitary confinement would mean to Shepard, along with the lack of trust displayed by Alenko. (Humans are social animals. Solitary confinement on this planet is designed to break the spirit of the person on which it is inflicted)._

_As always, reviews are welcome. Thanks to all for commenting and following._


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